Motherof8

Pretty much a regular weekend

2012-01-30T07:55:00.000-08:00

How did your weekend go? Mine, as always, too quickly! Not an unusual or remarkable weekend, but good.

Saturday is the day to try to get so many chores done that there is not time or energy to do during the week. Laundry, making my work breakfasts : ), shopping, hopefully a little house cleaning. How grateful I am for electricity and helpful household appliances, for well-stocked grocery stores, for farmers and truckers and that whole unseen army that makes our supplies available, for a job so I can pay for my food, for living with such fine young men that make few messes and help take care of things. Saturday best bits - being able to help David with one of his projects by loaning him my trailer (thereby helping mitigate the foolishness of that particular purchase and ensuing expenses!) and Reading Club with my guys. We are reading Inheritance, the 4th and last book of the Inheritance Cycle by Christopher Paolini.

Sunday joys - taking the Sacrament and remembering our Lord's love and sacrifice, holding a sleepy little granddaughter on my lap while discussing the joys of gospel living with sister saints, sitting in on a Board of Review for a fine young man who has just earned his 1st class rank, sharing dinner with our locally serving missionaries, grandchildren and daughter delight, as well as resident young men of quality. Enjoying the lively antics of my grandchildren and the wonderful goodness of how my children are with kids. Singing Sesame Street songs with Andrew. Enjoying the peace when all the guests leave and the house is quiet. Being able to pay bills and have everything current financially.

Comfortably sleeping in my snug bed in my own peaceful home.

A good weekend.

What A Way To Wake Up

2012-01-28T08:03:00.000-08:00

I almost never remember dreams. But this one woke me up. - No, not a spiritual or otherwise enlightening dream. Just a dream.

Ruth,Miriam and I and maybe someone else were in a hospital nursery viewing area. (Although the windows were a bit too high for decent viewing). I started talking to the nurse about people I know who had hard to diagnose diseases that sap one of energy and joy and cause discomfort or pain. I am concerned about my son Joseph who doesn't have the vigor a young man should and experiences joint pain, excessive tiredness, and depression. Ruth and Miriam started joking around and laughing. I asked them to act like grown-ups but they said they didn't want to. : ) The nurse asked them to go outside where they would enjoy seeing a newborn kitten and some other new animal baby I have forgotten. We talked a bit more. Then suddenly we were in a car talking. My car, I think. The nurse was driving on a highway or freeway going pretty fast, but not speeding. Suddenly, I saw a car in front of us, rapidly approaching backwards. Blue. Trunk slightly open ?) Although I was on the wrong side of the car, I could tell the driver was looking back at us and deliberately ramming our car. Just as I called a warning to the nurse/driver, the cars crashed. I don't think we were hurt. There were car parts and other debris all around. It all happened very quickly and the crash woke me up just as I was thinking about “It's always the car that rear-ends the other car's fault. There are people who stage rear-end accidents so they can sue for money”

I had awakened at 5:30am but determined to enjoy no alarm clock Saturday – especially since Sundays are now wake up early Sundays, especially tomorrow, and Saturday is the only opportunity to sleep in at all - if there is nothing scheduled in the morning – Anyway I managed to go back to sleep until the crash at 7:30. Not as refreshing as I had hoped. Not sure it was worth it. Is that the message? Get up and do your chores? But sleep is important, too, and chronic tiredness is a serious health threat. Sigh

Now time to get started on all the every day chores of life for which there is no time during the work week. Hope you have a happy and productive day.

The good news is that it was a dream. There was no crash. The bad news is that my concerns for Joseph's health are real. Something is not right. He should feel better and more alive. We have more than once taken him in for full checkups noting our concern for this vague wrongness, but the doctors didn't find anything. I want him to go again, but he is an adult now and has to decide himself. One gets tired of going to the doctor and doing tests and coming up blank.

Spoiler: We Did Not Blow Up

2012-01-03T20:46:00.000-08:00

But you probably know that because I posted this.

Andrew came out to meet me when I came home from work. We walked and talked together as I put my bike in the shed. As we passed the side of the house, I suddenly paused and asked, "Do you smell gas?" Yes! we did. By the gas meter.

On into the house, turning on lights to find my files. Went right to the Safety pamphlet from PG&E. With the phone number to call should you smell gas. Actually the first number listed was 911, but that seemed a bit much as nothing was happening. yet? I called the second number, PG&E, and pushed "1" for hazardous situation.

The lady wanted us to rate how strong the smell was. I was thinking 7, but Andrew thought 3. The lady thought we should err on the side of caution and go for 7. Which put us pretty high up on the dispatch priority list.

We were instructed to stay clear of the area in a safe place and NOT to turn ANYTHING on or off, not even to disconnect the phone at the end of the call. Of course, once she terminated the call, I reflexively hung up the phone, which I was not supposed to do. Nothing that could remotely cause a spark. We did not evacuate the house, but stayed at the opposite side of the house in the dining room and kitchen area. Joseph even thinking to close the bathroom and my bedroom doors in case a fire did start there.

Well, most of us. Joseph would not abandon his cat, so he was in the guy's room - the meter is outside one of their walls - trying to catch her which only made her angry. He almost got her in the carrier, but only succeeded in getting scratched. Despairing of taking her to safety, he opened the window on the non-meter wall and shooed her outside. Scraping metal??!! Part of it is plastic. I think. Then joined us in the dining room, automatically flipping the switch on the way. We are really not good at this.

The guys had been watching Harry Potter (1, I think). When it ended, Benjamin turned all the movie stuff off. oops There we go again.

I probably shouldn't have used my cell phone in a failed attempt to post to Facebook either. But it is not our fault that people kept calling us. We let the answering machine pick up (as usual)

It is a good thing that the leak was outside and none of it inside or we probably would have blown ourselves up.

It seemed like ages that we waited on Yellow Alert, both nervous and bored, dog on leash thinking she was going to get to go for a walk, but really ready to evacuate if something did blow or to be restrained when the PG&E guy came. Our incomplete 72 hour kits were near the door. Including the family cat that Joseph did manage to crate. Who was NOT happy. (No plan for bird rescue. Sorry, Mrs Cotton!) Fortunately, we had pizza which Benjamin had prepared for dinner. (We gave the walk-disappointed dog pizza crust which appeased her somewhat.) And while it seemed like a long time, it was less than an hour since I got home and the whole thing started before our hero arrived.

Mr PG&E quickly found the leak. Repaired it and checked around outside and inside the house for any further signs of trouble. Turned back on the pilot lights for the wall heaters and the water heater.

Not quite 2 hours after it began our adventure was over. No explosions.

“The Other Side of the Sky” by Farah Ahmedi

2012-01-03T15:58:00.000-08:00

Today I returned a book my supervisor loaned me. Actually, she had to ask me for it, I kept it so long. That is because I read through it twice. Once quickly for the amazing life story of this still very young woman and a second time more slowly for her perception and insights. I may add it to my library. I recommend “The Other Side of the Sky” by Farah Ahmedi

some words of wisdom and insight from Farah

Page 2

I have seen my dreams crushed, but new ones have sprouted in their place, and some of those dreams have even come true. I have lost loved ones, but not love itself.

Page 41

(she was talking about her hunger for learning that led to her hurrying to school and stepping on a landmine. While hunger for learning is a good thing, this seems like a good metaphor for much in life)

And that hunger was my downfall, for it made me careless- just for a few minutes, but that’s all it took: a single careless moment.

Page 62

And this, too is the world. Whatever my story means, this is part of it too. Again and again- even though this world is filled with such indifference and so much random cruelty- at a crucial moment some good person has crossed my path and taken the trouble to care about me.

Page 63

Meeting Christina was a turning point for me, because I had somebody now. I had somebody. That makes all the difference, you know. Even if your body is whole, your spirit can wilt. You suffer if no one knows you exist.

Page 65

…the mind is where it has to start.

Page 83

We weren’t laughing at the time, but we laughed later. You have to take your laughs where you find them. It’s good to laugh when you can.

Page 115

Actually, we did not know one single thing about our future, except that the road ahead of us brimmed with difficulty, danger, and darkness. In any other circumstance we would have been trembling with anxiety. Yet, in the midst of this terrible time, we exuded exuberance. And why? Because we had reached this spot. The future lay in God’s hands, but we had reached this spot. It’s a good thing that a person can pause at times and take pleasure in difficulties overcome, because if we had spared one droplet of thought on our future, that thought would have stripped us of joy and drenched us with dread. Instead, for a moment there, one memorable moment, we tasted unmitigated happiness.

Page 122

Everything becomes normal if it just keeps going long enough.

Page 123

When you see some possibility of getting out of a pit, you can draw strength from the idea of where you will be once you get out: You see a goal worth fighting for. If the best you can hope for is to sink more slowly, struggle comes to feel pointless. You say to yourself, If I’m going to sink anyway, what does it matter whether I sink quickly or slowly? You lose your drive.

Page 132

And with that surrender, a change began. I felt it in that moment. I felt it ever increasingly in the days that followed. What was this change? My attention turned toward God. And the more I attended to God, the more I discovered how to be patient and tolerant and how to relax. When that girl snapped her orders at me, I let it wash away, I let it go, I absorbed none of her spite and hatred, and so she failed to plant any seeds of bitterness inside me. Negativity stopped sprouting in my heart. I grew so calm, so serene that even the girl who was bossing me around noticed the change and eased up on me.

Page 132

Strangely enough, whenever I was absorbed in solitary pryer, I felt I had company. I felt somebody’s presence and tenderness embracing me.

Page 133

No sooner had I posed such questions in my heart than I felt a warmth glowing and growing form the middle of me, and I knew that God was listening to me, that God was nearby, very close indeed, an invisible light, a bodiless friend, a smiling power. I had such a strong and positive feeling about God being there.

Page 165

And I still feel how important it is to pay attention to God, to recognize God, to believe in God, to live with a pure heart and let only purity and truth come pouring from one’s soul: That’s the way to live. Such is my belief.

Page 189

You are trapped inside your language like a rabbit in a cage.

Page 189

Everybody enjoys reading an adventure story or seeing an adventure movie, but a real-life adventure is harder to enjoy because you don’t know how it will turn out.

Page 207 – after visiting a museum and learning about dinosaurs

It makes you think about the world and what lasts and what doesn’t.

Page 210

As they say in Afghanistan, when someone extends their hand, don’t climb on their shoulder.

Page 213

I want to know about her religion, just as she wants to know about mine, We can talk about our beliefs without pushing each other to feel wrong. This is one reason why I love her so much.

Page 223-4

“Why has America done so well?”

In our American history class I read that when people came here from so many places, they came with ambition, they came to start over, and they worked hard. That’s probably part of it. Also, they were able to raise their voices here. They were able to express themselves and search for their own beliefs and say what they believed out loud. I think that is why America has developed so remarkably. Here, people can live their lives without fear. In places like Afghanistan, by contrast, everybody is afraid. Nobody dares to raise his voice. I thin America has grown strong because it lets everyone take a part.

Over in Pakistan and Afghanistan and places like that, it isn’t just the government that holds society back. People are afraid of their neighbors, of what “others will say.” People hold one another in check. Here, you can try something new. If you invent something, people will congratulate you and take an interest in your invention. There, they will say, “Why did you invent this thing? We don’t’ want something different! What was wrong with with what we had before?” Here, you can announce your opinion, and if you’re against something you can say so and it becomes part of the discussion, not a reason why you have to go into hiding.

Page 226

I know it’s hard for American students to reach out to us refugees, and maybe you worry about being rejected or put on the spot. But here is one thing I want to say in this book: It’s harder for us to reach out to you-we, with our clumsy English. I want to say, Don’t be afraid of us-you have to understand: We’re afraid of you. We want to be friends, but you have to take the first step.

Page 244

Some of the improvements are just details, but details add up. In the end , details make a life.

Page 249

Now I don’t want to erase, or forget, or destroy any part of myself. I want to love myself and keep adding to who I am.

If You Can Read, You Can Cook

2011-12-29T22:06:00.000-08:00

When I was still having babies and having so much of my time and energy monopolized by them, my older children would sometimes express a desire for cookies or something of that nature. I would point them toward the kitchen and the cook books. There were precious few moments of mother and daughter working side by side with mother dispensing pearls of wisdom. My child would bravely forge ahead on her own (mostly her - I had girl, boy, girl, girl, girl, then boy, boy, boy). The young cook in the kitchen and mom in the other room tending to baby, but available for questions. They soon became accomplished dessert cooks. For some mysterious reason it took them much, much longer to master dinner type cooking. For most of them not until they had moved out. ; )

There was a bit of a gap, perhaps due to lack of babies. Number 6 and 7 don't really cook. Although they have all baked bread from scratch several times. I actually did work in the kitchen with the guys teaching bread and biscuits and a few other things. (You handle bread dough like a dog and biscuit dough like a cat.)

Maybe because of the divorce forcing me to go out to work, Number 8 cooks well. He often fixes dinner - having it ready or well under way when I get home. (What a guy!) I need to help get the other guys cooking. Andrew is somewhat interested now. (Benjamin tried to teach him a few things before his mission, but Andrew was not interested yet) Now, he recognizes the need to expand beyond "Proctor Place Special" - from his mission - tomato soup and ramon or just the ramon noodles, I guess. He says he actually likes it. The rest of us refuse to try it. He made apple crisp tonight because I over bought a bit on the Christmas fruit. (how unusual)

I have sometimes felt guilty about not teaching my girls and oldest son more personally, but I must say my method seems to have worked quite well as all of them are very good cooks. The girls, in fact, quite out-shine me in the kitchen and all of them have gone on to cook things I never would have tried. Including David. I have never made chicken cordon bleu. He not only made it; he cooked it in the back of the car turned solar cooker while he and his date enjoyed a day at the beach.

Must stop talking about this. I am getting hungry.

The Fat Lady Didn't Sing

2011-12-27T10:56:00.000-08:00

While taking time off to work on my Christmas preparations, I saw part of the Dr. Oz show Friday. His guest was a woman who weighs over 700lbs and who wants to more than double that to something like 1800 lbs and become the fattest woman ever. He threw medical numbers at her to try to convince her that she is hurting herself. She just kept smiling and insisting that she is healthy.

One: It was embarrassing. To me! Her blood sugar, while higher than it should be is better than mine. They showed a clip of her doing sit-ups. Multiple sit-ups. I do not think I can do even one. I am, it is true, “morbidly obese”, but she has over 500 lbs on me and in some ways IS healthier. All I can say is that I ride my bike to work. I don’t think she could.

I used to say that if I ever got to be so much overweight, I would give up and join the circus as a fat lady. Well sadly I got there, but that’s almost average nowadays. I really don’t want to weigh enough to qualify for the job.

Two: Dr. Oz did not address her where she lives. He has no real idea why she is fat or why she is choosing to stay fat and get fatter. Or doesn’t think it matters?

What I think:

A long time ago, she decided that she could never be the ideal weight. She was fat and ever would be fat and she might as well accept it. Losing weight is incredibly hard for many of us. When I try to be good, I maintain maybe, but hardly lose. Admittedly, I do not try VERY HARD, but I can be careful and deny myself, take smaller portions, and try to only eat healthy non-fattening things during my perpetual snack attacks at work – and not lose. If I am not trying at least a little, I gain. How much easier to just give up. I think she did. She decided: I am fat, that’s me and I like it.

She makes money being fat. Dr, Oz practically did commercials for fat porn (whatever they call it). People pay to see pictures of really fat women. They pay to see videos of her eating. If she were to try to lose weight, it would not only be hard, hard work and deprivation, but she would lose her income. How could she support herself?! especially while she was still fat, too fat to get about easily and too fat to make a good impression on job interviews, too fat to look good, but not quite fat enough to be a big fat porn star?

I wondered why in the world she would go on the Dr. Oz show, but then realized – it was for the publicity. She was advertising. Sad for her. And sad for Dr. Oz, because I don’t think he gets it. He wanted to help her, but he didn’t seem to even try to understand her. He was no Dr, Phil. ; )

Christmas Card Lament # 2

2011-12-16T12:31:00.001-08:00

No pretty card to put on your wall.

No tender pictures of a baby small.

No clever verses of meaningful rhyme

From me to you this Christmas time.

No card all, I am sorry to say,

But I wish you well today and always.

Rejoice in the birth of our Savior dear

And may you have a happy new year!

Christmas Card Lament

2011-12-16T10:58:00.001-08:00

It takes a year to get here.

It’s something we all know.

It’s no surprise it’s coming.

At times it’s seems too slow.

Yet again it gets me.

I find myself behind.

Some years better,

Some years worse,

I get myself in a bind.

This year sets a record

Even for me, I fear.

I haven’t manage a single thing

For Christmas cards this year.

No good excuses.

No good reason.

I just blew it

This Christmas season.

It’s not that I don’t love you.

It’s not that I don’t care.

I certainly love Jesus.

I am just inept.

Drain, Drain Go Away OR When It Drains, It Pours

2011-12-11T00:22:00.000-08:00

For some time now, we have been having minor drain problems with the garage sink into which clothes washer drains.

Part of the problem, we know, is lint and pet hair from the wash clogging the sink. So we have a rubber lint catcher which sits in the drain to catch lint, pet hair, etc before it enters the pipes. We clean that out every load. Sometimes a couple of times in the middle of a load. Still the water backs up until the sink is full and sometimes beyond - flooding the garage.

But it is not just that. When we clean out the lint catcher or sometimes even remove it, the water starts to flow down the drain, but after several inches stops or significantly slows. Indicating a clog somewhere down the line. Sometimes we have to stop the washer and wait to keep the water from over flowing. Sometimes we don't, but should have. : (

Today our friend Ron Brown came over and ran a 20 foot long or so snake down the pipes from the garage and also from the outside cleanout. Found nothing. He put the sink back. Alas, perhaps a gasket is missing or something, because now there is a slight drip under the sink. We temporarily put an old ice cream bucket under the sink to catch the drips. No big problem.

More fun! Suddenly the washer is not draining. This has happened before. I just tell the washer to try again. It does and life goes on. Not this time. It spun, but did not issue forth water. Water leaked from under the washer. Still more water on our already wet from flooding floor. Benjamin discovered that if he took the hose out of the sink and lowered it nearly to the floor that water came out. Bucket by bucket he emptied the washer. When it was nearly empty, the washer again spun and spit out water into the sink. So, he set the washer to spin out and rinse again. Will it work? Oh the excitement!

So, now we have a drain that doesn't drain well, but does drip and a washer that may or may not spin out the water.

I have purchased untold amounts of liquid drain cleaner and poured them down that and other drains. Thinking that was the responsible good homeowner thing to do. It has not helped the laundry drain. I don't know if it has done any good with the other drains - my particular concern being the bathtub drain to deal with the copious amounts of hair and soap scum that gets beyond what I can clean out by hand. So far, no problems there (count your blessings and knock on wood). But one of my friends says that at best I am wasting my money and at worst I may be damaging my pipes. argh!

And like I said, the garage drain remains very, very slow. I fear I must call in a professional plumber for that drain. My house pipes are not very old. We completely re-piped not long before the divorce - one of the few things actually done for the house with money borrowed for house repairs (and mostly used to buy a then brand new Prius for the then head of household).

I may also need to invest in a new washer. I long ago got tired of throwing away money on the maintenance plan for the washer and dryer (which now sometimes squeaks, also not good). I am thinking that a few years of a maintenance plan is enough for a new appliance and that when I replace the washer, I will get one that catches the lint and stuff like my previous one did. I am not looking forward to 1) shopping for an appliance or maybe two (I am not a super smart informed shopper) and 2) depleting my savings. But! I do have some savings and should be able to flat out buy a basic washer (and dryer if need be). : )

I hate to draw from my not very large savings, but what a blessing to be living now so that is the option instead of adding to the (now non existent except for larger than it should be mortgage) debt load as under the old regime!

I still have no retirement savings, but I no longer live in debt. Wonderful! I am struggling to pay even for community college for my guys to take even a handful of classes and I will only be able to pay a fraction of Benjamin's mission costs. But inch by fraction of an inch, I am becoming (hopefully) financially secure. Not rich, mind you, but debt free (except my mortgage and 2 credit cards that I pay off every month) and able to meet minor (very minor) emergencies.

What a relief after after living through a period of getting several calls a week from debt collectors for debts I didn't even know existed, going through a bankruptcy and then a few years after paying that off with a surprise inheritance discovering in addition to house and car loans that I knew about another $30,000 in secret debts and rushing headlong towards another possible bankruptcy. All the while scrimping on almost everything to get by. This while my husband was earning very good money (but spending better and not on his family).

So I whine and complain and worry a bit about money, but life is so much better now. If I am careful and blessed, I will remain solvent. NICE

Still, I would rather that the washer emptied and the drain drained. Just glad the toilets work! and kitchen and bathroom sink and tub!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Washer problem persisting. Looks like I get a new washer for Christmas!

Thank You Mysterious, Sneaky, Overly Generous Friends and Family!

2011-11-25T22:25:00.000-08:00

Some time this afternoon amid the visiting and games, my daughter Ruth told me that they had received a package with instructions to remove any identifiers and give the package to me to open without telling me the source. (!)

The note inside said.,

“To Barbara

Love Your Friends and Family

Merry Christmas !!! “

You cannot imagine my stunned surprise to discover a scented candle, bath and body lotion, lovely warm slipper socks, a beautiful soft warm throw, AND an Amazon KINDLE!! as well as a sleeve for the Kindle.

Wow! Oh, Wow!

This is amazing and too much. I know this represents a lot of love, thought and sacrifice (not to mention clever planning) - far more than I deserve or could hope to return – even if I knew who the “culprits” are. I have wonderful friends whom I could suspect. But honestly, although my friends and family are rich in goodness, I don't think any of them are rich enough financially for throwing money around. So I am mystified. Like I said this represents sacrifice as well as a wonderful amount of caring.

Since I do not know who my bounteous benefactors are, I have to be nice to everyone. (So much for this being the perfect stress reduction kit!) (After I opened the package, my daughter even took away the box and gave me a plain box just in case there were any clues I might detect)

Excuse me, I need to spend a little time with Mark and I am going to spend a little time getting to know Kindle and I should get some sleep tonight.

Any suggestions for Kindle's name?

Some Like It Hot

2011-11-22T15:52:00.000-08:00

All day snacking potluck in my unit today. Great minds must think alike. Crackers & cheese, baguettes & dip.

My (East Indian) super brought some vegetable dish & was trying to persuade me to try some. I had already heard her & a co-worker discussing it so I knew it was spicy. She said, "Oh it's not very spicy. You should try a little." I have learned better than that, partly from our dear Laotian friends at church. “Oh, it’s not very spicy – only a little”
And then, if you are foolish enough to believe them, you burn. Shall I say perceptions differ and I don’t go for spicy.

I stood firm against my supervisor, to her disappointment. I finally announced that I was the token non-spice person in the unit so that we can have cultural diversity. (We all know how important cultural diversity is in the workplace and that one must never ever harass someone because they are part of a different group.) That seemed to stop her.

Later while she was out, another co-worker stopped at my cube with steam coming out of her ears and told me that I do not want to try it. : ) oh, surprise

Chain of Thought

2011-11-09T10:49:00.000-08:00

There's a lot of complaining going on about the blurred holidays. Frankly all the complaining bothers me much more than what is happening in the stores. Frankly, I don't spend that much time in stores. I think the stores may be a little silly. I know people who plan/shop/prepare for Christmas all year long - I keep intending to be one of them - without the stimulus of Christmas decor.

Then,too, I am a bit guilty of blurring the holidays myself. Shortly after Halloween, I start my Thankful Chain. We have been doing this at home for years. It is fun to see how far around the (interior) house we can get our chain to run. We write down things we are thankful for - big or small, "silly" or serious. But we write them on red, white and green paper links. So they are Christmassy decorations. And, as my children will attest, I have emotional difficulties taking down the chain. It has been known to stay up well into the next year until it starts to die a natural death.

This year I have started a chain at work. My chain at work is actually at this point longer than our chain at home. But then I do spend more of my waking hours there.

Yes, this is my cubicle and you can see one reason I make my minimalist supervisor crazy but she is learning to ignore it or at least not say anything.

You Go, Girl!

2011-11-03T16:53:00.000-07:00

My daughter got a 2 week layoff notice last Friday. Not good news. Single, homeowner, “mom” to two dogs.

She went to her sister’s house and cried on her shoulder. She huddled under the blankets and felt sick – she hadn’t been feeling well, anyway. She had her siblings over for a movie night. Her sister stayed over with her. Ok, she felt sorry for herself a little. On Friday.

Over the weekend she did things that make her happy. Saturday morning they went to the pumpkin patch with another sister’s family. Three kids in a pumpkin patch will lift your spirits. In the afternoon they went to Apple Hill with the guys and me. Beautiful day.

Sunday she spent some time with friends.

Monday morning was time to get back to work and she hit the ground running. She is still working her last two weeks at her current job, but she immediately updated her résumé, started making contacts, and checking resources. She has her network on the look-out for her. By Wednesday she had at least one interview lined up.

I admire how she is handling this challenge. A little time feeling bad, some time doing things that make her happy, and then working hard and creatively at job hunting, doing everything she can think of and getting suggestions from others.

She doesn’t even get irritated with me when I send her far-fetched job opportunities. (I pass on pretty much every job opportunity I hear about no matter what it is to a handful of job seekers in my circle and to employment specialists at my church – you never know). (at least she doesn’t say so).

I am impressed by her coping skills and positive fighting spirit, her organization, her hard work. If I were an employer, I would want to hire someone with that kind of gumption. (As well as brilliant, keenly observant, fun, detail oriented, responsible, et cetera, et cetera.

Abby – Spot – Heidi

2011-09-28T16:07:00.000-07:00

Allison “inspired” me to find some little friends and place them around the office. You remember, I posted this to Facebook, “Kaiser reminds us to make play a part of every day. The day we stop playing is the day we start aging. How do you make play part of your day?” last Thursday.

Allison Voigt Hamaker commented “At my last job we had a styrofoam rocket on a rubber band that we used to shoot across the office at each other. We also had a little bear that we would hide and leave ransom notes. It was fun when the person discovered where it was hidden and moved it to a new place.”

I took Friday off – the lack of pressing work at the office contrasted with the amount of pressing work at home had me sick and anxious. Andrew, Benjamin and I went to DI – the guys needed clothes.

I found some little playmates. Back at work Monday, I made them little books.

Hi!

My name is Heidi

Now that you have found me,

please sign & date my book.

Then “hide” me somewhere in

rm 1040 for someone else to find.

Thanks, Heidi

Heidi is a little light brown bear. She is still sitting amongst some manila envelopes where I placed her Monday afternoon. Spot the Dalmation remains on a window ledge. Abby the red crab who was left sitting on a red box in the supply area is gone. I hope someone found her and is playing the game and NOT that someone found her and confiscated her and stopped the game.

I thought I bought a moose I called Hunter, but he disappeared before I got to work.

I am so professional!

This is not an off the road vehicle

2011-09-22T12:54:00.000-07:00

My children, the older ones especially, probably remember that phrase. Something I learned the hard way with our Chevy van when I drove the kids down to the river and got stuck in the rocks. Something we would repeat often when one of our motoring adventures looked like it might be getting too adventuresome. Apparently, something I need to remember about my bicycle.

I probably should avoid riding on cobblestone streets, boardwalks, and rough railroad tracks. Also, be wary of near-collisions which send me staggering to the side of the path. After the near collision yesterday – coming out of Old Sacramento, I swerved around some pedestrians, not realizing until too late that another bicycler was passing me. We actually did body bump and my bike and I kind of bounced to the side. We both apologized; he looked to see that I was still upright, and rode on –

Anyway, after the near collision, I noticed that my front brake was acting a bit funny. Going home, it was rubbing against my wheel. I couldn’t figure out how to stop that, so I rode home with it disengaged. Joseph looked at my bike last night. It appears that a spring or two is lost or broken.

This morning I noticed that my back brake is also rubbing sometimes. And my back wheel is a little wobbly. Not good. But I rode in – even though I really wanted a mental health day.

I was going to do a lunch time ride, anyway, but when I pulled Sylvia out of her locker, she just seemed too gimpy. I hope we do ok going home this evening.

I am feeling gimpy, too. A couple of joints making me a bit too aware of them.

I am trying to figure out the logistics of taking her in to the bike shop for a day. That mental health day just might be in the works tomorrow. I need to watch that. I so often find myself wishing I could have many more days at home.

Yesterday, my supervisor asked me a couple of times if I was ok, which I was. I rather wish she would ask me today. I could honestly answer that I am functional but not feeling top form. Which would set me up for calling in tomorrow. The work has been slow enough lately missing a day now and then doesn’t cause any stress. Just wish I didn’t have to burn leave time.

On my bike or on the computer, lunch break flies by.

Busy Days as usual

2011-09-20T16:40:00.000-07:00

As Andrew is going about the business of life biking around town alone and because I worry, I did a little (admittedly very little) on-line research, then stopped by Target on the way home last Friday and got him a Trac phone. I don’t see going to the expense of getting him a Verizon phone right now as Benjamin will be leaving on his mission in a few months and Andrew can take custody of the “boy phone” then.

In part of his biking around town - Andrew went to his Dad’s to help out Friday – after taking care of our freezer exchange. Emptying out the old freezer, dealing with the delivery people, and filling the new freezer. I am not totally thrilled with the freezer, but it will be very nice to have frost free. The ancient one we were using was one I got for something like $25 from a neighbor. Before that I had a chest freezer which I liked, but had had for decades and it got to where we had been duct-taping the lid for quite some time. It’s day was over. I find that, unlike most of my friends, I prefer chest, but they take up a lot of floor space and I don’t think they come frost free. So I got this upright. It is a bit smaller than the old one, but I figure not having ice formations taking up space will counter that. Actually, I hope to figure out how to afford space and money to get a small chest freezer as well. Sometime in the future – All you upright lovers, tell me how you get a decent amount of food in there without having an avalanche when you open the door?

Andrew went over to his dad’s from about 11-5 Friday, wonderful young man that he is (Andrew, not Glen). Fortunately, a neighbor suggested they bolt the ramp down so Glen is no longer so concerned that the ramp might be stolen so Andrew doesn’t have to get it out and put it away every time Glen wants to go anywhere. When that looked like it was going to be the case, Andrew had a complex chart drawn up to try to accommodate school, quorum responsibilities, meetings, and Glen. He was even going to miss half on one class’s meetings. As it was, Andrew helped Glen with some chores and shopping. He thinks that he can just go over and help once a week instead of the complicated and demanding, weird hours, daily schedule Andrew was looking at when he was on ramp duty. Since that happy thought however, I had to discuss a bit of business with Glen who said that he wanted someone to be there whenever he goes in or out because he is unsteady on the ramp. He is working his State job from home and taking a few more days off from his security job which is why he thinks Andrew doesn’t have to come every day this week. He has not asked Andrew yet. Andrew cannot stay even if he wanted to. He has obligations and responsibilities. Oh, if it were really necessary he could make arrangements. Andrew may be the only one of his children willing to help so much. David and Teresa have helped with driving chores, but I think there was no thought of asking David to help with the odd hour schedule which included middle of the night. Hopefully, Glen can get better used to the ramp and learn to handle it on his own very quickly. I know there are a couple of ideas to make it safer – tennis balls on the legs of his walker and going down the ramp backwards so he is not pitching forward downhill. Glen should have a prostheses and be walking pretty normally by the end of October. Anyway, Andrew is pretty awesome.

As he often does, wonderful young man that he is, Benjamin made dinner Friday night– pizza – Friday is often pizza night. I think once Esther told Benjamin that Friday is pizza night at their house.

I spent much of the evening observing Joseph and Andrew figuring out the new phone and talking on (another) phone to one of my daughters. Benjamin felt a bit neglected. He didn’t pout much. He came up with a plan. Forced Family Fun Friday. He baked cookies, put on a movie, and gathered us round to learn to play Chapter and Verse. http://chapterandversegame.blogspot.com/ We just played simple basic because some of us were tired and hadn’t seen it before.

Saturday was a busy day.

I dropped Andrew and Benjamin and their bicycles off at Elk Grove Park where they helped work on maintaining a dirt bike park. They planned to bike home, I would have picked them up had they called, but another Institute person gave them a lift home.

Joseph, Anna and I went to the Great American River Clean-Up. Not sure whether it was because there was less litter or because there were so many volunteers, but we only picked up a small amount of trash in the hour or so we worked.

Then we did chores – took my bike to the bike shop expecting to leave it and hoping to pick it up later in the afternoon, but they worked on it while we waited, went to Costco for much needed gas in the car and a quick, light shopping trip – over $200. Oops.

Saturday evening we went to movie night at Okie Park and saw Gnomeo and Juliet. That was fun. We enjoyed it. However, it is not going on my must buy list.

Sunday was a busy day, too.

Our Home Teacher visited us before church Sunday. I took Sophie (my laptop) to church for the first time. I thought that I would either nap or write letters on Sophie while Andrew and Benjamin were in choir. Sophie, had her own ideas – installing updates. I socialized. I did take notes on Sophie during Sacrament Meeting. Not great notes, but it helped me resist the too-often tendency to drift off. While the last speaker was talking, I got a text from Liz R. She wasn’t feeling well, had just awakened, could I teach her Primary class. I got the text telling me which lesson when we were about to sing the closing song. Fortunately, the kids are very cooperative and the lesson was based on a scripture event I had recently read.

We had my birthday dinner with Hinds, Miriam, and Debi Sunday evening. French dip and fruit salad. Delicious! And dessert! Homemade chocolate cookie cup filled with homemade chocolate ice cream, topped with homemade whipped cream and decorated with homemade chocolate – I don’t know what you call it – filigree – hearts, flowers, and I love you. A treat for the eyes and the palate.

Busy and pleasant weekend. Over too soon, as usual.

Lock 'er Up!

2011-09-20T15:31:00.000-07:00

Thursday afternoon the gal who handles our transit discount vouchers and the bike lockers for Parks came to my office with 3 keys in her hand. She had done some shake downs and found lockers that were not being used. Shhh! Don’t tell anyone, but I think she moved me up the line a little. I used to email a couple of times a year asking where I was on the list. I also submitted ideas for more bike lockers. It is well know that I bike daily year round. In other words, I showed sincere interest. She not only gave me a little boost, she let me choose which of the 3 lockers I wanted. We went down together and she opened each one. The one I got was slightly easier to open, NOT full of cobwebs and on an end which I like. Sweet 16! Nice happy birthday to me! (16 is the locker. I am *cough* multiples of 16)

I put my bike in the locker right away. Slight problem, either the locker door is a little too low, or my bike handlebar a bit too high, but it took some wrestling and tilting to get the bike in. Saturday, Joseph and I went to the bike shop. He had gotten me a new front basket for my bicycle, but we couldn’t install it because of my quick release wheel. We exchanged the basket. I also had them lower my handlebars and rotate them. I had been riding with my arms fully extended forward. Now they are pretty nearly fully extended but a little more down. The bike slides right in! Joseph also got me a quick release extension bar for people without enough room on their bars. We put my headlights on that (one to flash and a brighter steady one). I take the extension bar off the handlebar to put the bike in the locker, but that is easy and fits better than the lights directly on the handlebar.

Now that I have a bike locker, my bike is safer from thieves, won’t be out in the winter weather all day, AND I can go out on a lunch time ride and have a place to park when I get back!

Friday, I rode over to California Parks Foundation Park(ing) Day. A temporary mini park set up in a couple of parking spaces. They had a fire ring and camp chairs, little trees, and a petition and postcard for the Governor asking him to save our parks. A futile effort, I fear, but we must try.

Yesterday, I rode south out past the Sacramento Marina to the end of Miller Park on the river then back north through Old Sacramento (cobblestone streets and wooden board walks are BUMPY!) to the Sacramento History Museum.

Today I rode to the Old City Cemetery where the Native Plant Society has some areas planted with (would you guess) native California plants. I am thinking about planting some native plants in my yard.

It is quite nice to get a mini get-away!

When I got back today, my supervisor said she doesn’t like me having a bike locker because she cannot come talk to me at my desk during lunch now. Another plus. : )

Birthday Weekend

2011-09-11T23:10:00.000-07:00

Hawaiian Haystacks and happy company were the order of the evening Friday at David & Teresa's (2 of 8 and better half). They also invited their landlady and son/ church friends Velma and Moroni Leash. Moroni is also Elder's Quorum President to whom Andrew is 2nd counselor. The food was good and the conversation pleasant.

One of the most interesting tidbits is Velma's assertion that science says there is no reason people shouldn't live to be 120-150 meaning I am barely entering middle-age. Of course, my first thought was "I cannot afford to live that long." Which is so very true. Unless I can work until I am at least 110. Isn't that a bit of an exhausting thought?

David and Teresa are pretty much settled into a cute little cottage in the Leash compound and I think they have the nicest backyard of the set. What a change from their last couple of living quarters - especially including our family room floor for a few months!

Saturday morning the boys made me a delicious breakfast.

Then we went to the Single Adults Ceramic Tile class. We learned to operate a wet saw and cut tile. We learned a little bit about thin set. Our teacher, Max, supplied a lot of discontinued ceramic floor tile and some 24 x 16 wood pieces. The idea was that we would each tile our board which would make a nice little table top. However, more people came to the activity than was anticipated. There were plenty of supplies, but tile cutting takes a long time and the morning was long gone and it looked like it would still be some time before our turn to cut. Andrew had designed one table top and Benjamin and I another (with minimal help from Joseph), Like the other ladies ahead of us, our design was a tad more ambitious than Max had anticipated (he didn't give any guidelines about that and ours wasn't really fancy). Anyway, we finally decided we didn't want to spend ALL day at Tiffany's (delightful though she is) and I fancied I could see some signs of stress in Max at the idea that we might. So, we abandoned our tiles. I think we learned a good bit, but I am not sure if we are ready to take on any important tiling jobs.

After a change and a bite to eat, we entered what I think of as our Keystone Kops mode. Calls back and forth with a daughter who might join us on our adventure, muddling about trying to get our act together, finally admitting that Joseph did not want to go anywhere whether State Park or Beach. Eventually, we decided on the beach partly because Anna could go and it was her Adoption Day as well as my birthday. And finally, after determining that daughter cannot come, Benjamin, Andrew, Anna and I hit the road - stopping to tank up at Costco on the way. It takes us far too long to get out of town!!

As we drove, I enjoyed a birthday call with Sariah (hands free Bluetooth). Maybe partly because I was slightly distracted, because changes have been made, and because I haven't made the drive in too long, I missed a critical turn off that would have taken us past where Marine World/Africa USA (how I miss it!!!) used to be and around to approach from the north. Instead, we found ourselves on the Bay Bridge - a TOLL bridge heading into the Oakland/San Francisco area. argh! Andrew loaned me the toll money. As we were crossing the bridge, Andrew exclaims, "That's where Huell Howser went!" I glance over and say, "The Coit Tower?" "I don't know what they call it but he went there." Impulsively we take the next exit and try to find "the Coit Tower". The guys start going "That's it, we're there!" and I find myself circling the TransAmerica Pyramid building. Apparently, Andrew and I had watched different episodes. : ) It's getting a little late, I am not that good at driving in San Fransico anymore, and I don't have money for parking even if I could find any place, so we abandon the Pyramid which is not the Coit Tower and try to find our way to and across the Golden Gate Bridge so we can get to Rodeo Beach.

It was evening by the time we got to the beach which meant that we had the excitement of seeing racoons who were out checking the picnic areas. Anna really liked that, but would have liked it better had she not been restrained. At least SHE thinks so. I don't think that it would go well if she did get a chance to see a coon up close. We all walked along the beach. The guys and Anna went up on the rocks a little bit. Our visit was very short, but even that does something healing to my spirits. I have said it before, but the only thing that makes me think there is anything to that theory of evolution is the pull I feel to the ocean's edge. Something in me just has to go to the seashore. Not some long sandy beach. Rocky coves with crashing waves.

Today was a pleasant typical Sunday. I seem to be hearing more push to prepare for General Conference than usual. Our talks in Sacrament Meeting were about following the prophets. Always a good idea!

While not attending any official observance, I have been mindful of the 9/11 annivesary all weekend. Mourning the loss, sympathizing with those who lost so much, thinking especially of the emergency responders, and being grateful for my life.

This evening the guys and I were settling into a bit of Reading Club - reading an exciting yet-to-be-published novel by a dear friend (and talented first time author)- when the phone rang and there went the evening.

The boys' dad, my ex, is recuperating from a further amputation (diabetes complication) - now mid-calf. He wants Andrew to come stay with him for a month to help him out. Starting possibly some time next week. Supposedly the thing he wants help with mostly is an aluminum ramp to help him get in and out of the house but dares not leave set up lest it get stolen. (I expect that there will be "other duties as required." Andrew is trying to work out how to handle his SCC classes and Elder's Quorum Presidency meetings and responsibilities. He will be able to light rail from near Dad's right to SCC. But he is going to have to drop his aerobics class. He will come to our neighborhood Thursday night for EQP meeting, sleep over at home and go back to Dad's Friday morning. It means Andrew won't be available for Saturday adventures for awhile. Maybe some late Saturday afternoon. Andrew has a good attitude about this. (Better than I do, although I expected something like this) Anyway, as you can imagine, it is going to be a bit of a sacrifice on Andrew's part, so keep him in your prayers. Pray for Glen, too. The better he does, the sooner Andrew can come home.

Tomorrow I am taking the day off work for my birthday present to me. I hope to do some stamping. And maybe get some Christmas ideas. Unfortunately, I don't have definite plans yet. I hope I get "inspired" tomorrow morning - or dream up something tonight.

Things Cut - Parks, Hair, Downspouts

2011-09-05T22:21:00.000-07:00

I had intended today to visit another couple of our lovely State Parks marked for closure - Bothe-Napa Valley State Park and Bale Grist Mill State Historic Park. However, as both Joseph and I were also feeling the burden of things that need doing, that pleasure has been deferred. Hopefully not too long.

Joseph spent much of the day working on computer issues.

Andrew cut his own hair - as is his habit since some time on his mission. He keeps it pretty short. It looks good on him, but it took some getting used to for me. I think he has great hair and I miss the more traditional business cut he used to wear.

Benjamin and I went to Home Depot where we ordered a freezer (upright - because of floor space and frost free, but I still want a chest freezer - maybe a small one later, when I figure out where) and bought diverter supplies to turn the force of water from being directed straight to our foundation when the rains come. Then he went to get a haircut (more the style I prefer, but a little shorter than usual this time) while I picked up milk and a few other food stuffs. Benjamin has been observing the hair cutters each time and may one day attempt to do his own. But the business cut is more difficult that the style Andrew does. Why does their mother not cut their hair, you ask? Because they hope to be able to be seen in public without having to wear bags over their heads, that's why.

The guys and I spent more time than I had expected wrestling with downspouts, but I think our foundation is now under much less of a delugenal threat. Also we did battle with a few weeds, but I must say the weeds are still in command of the battle field.

Eventually we decided we had worked enough. Joseph built a fire in the family room fireplace. Andrew popped in a DVD of some of America's Scenic Wonders or something like that - Pacific Coast -- Death Valley, Big Sur, Yosemite, Olympic (or is it Olympia?) National Forest, Glacier Bay, and unpronouncable, unspellable volcano on Maui, and maybe others. We roasted hot dogs and made s'mores. Lazy, stay at home "camping" fun.

We did not play a game Learn the Scriptures While Harnessing Your Inner Geek. I did not do any recreational reading although my book lists, both personal and Reading Club (the "boys" and I), are quite long and getting longer. I did not untangle Debi's furry yarn. I still have not started anything for Christmas, and oh, boy am I in trouble. Oh, there are hosts of things I did not do.

Again I lament, as I so often do, weekends, even three day weekends are TOO SHORT.

But it has been a good one and I am grateful.

Hooray for Home Depot

2011-09-04T10:24:00.000-07:00

I emailed both Home Depot and Fiskars about my nasty, soggy rain-barrel installation instructions yesterday. This morning I found an email from Home Depot
thanking me for contacting them,
apologizing for the unpleasant experience,
telling me that the store manager has been instructed check into storage procedures with the intent to prevent this from happening
AND a gift card.
That's customer service!

2011-09-03T23:01:00.000-07:00

I believe that often happiness is a choice. I believe in living the dream and blessings that you have rather than pining for the ones you have not. I sometimes forget! but I believe in more fully living your life.

Friday night Debi invited family over for Toy Story 3 and pizza. Benjamin made pizza for us to take. Debi provided a pizza and DELICIOUS chocolate chocolate chip cookies. Neither Andrew nor I had seen Toy Story 3 before. Good company. Good movie. Most all of us at least got teary-eyed.

Of course, Debi also entangled me in an evil scheme or, rather, skein. She has some (probably expensive) furry yarn which is (we hope not) hopelessly tangled. As in the past I have been able to straighten out some knotty problems, she handed this one to me. I was up a bit too late working on it last night after we got home. It's a bit addicting, strangely. I cannot tell if I am actually making any headway. One minute I will think I might be. The next I will be tempted to chuck the whole thing. But stubborness, pride, love for my daughter, the conviction that it probably is a pricey bit of "yarn" have me still at it. Well, not at this exact moment. But off and on through the day. It may take a very long time (before I either succeed or give up).

This morning Benjamin, Andrew and I set up the two rain-barrels I got at Home Depot some time ago. The instructions were sealed in a plastic bag sealed inside plastic with the diverter parts but still soaking wet, slimy and foul smelling. nice. I emailed the company and Home Depot. I also found installation instructions online, although for a slightly different diverter, it turns out, which messed up our measurements in downspout cutting. But Benjamin is Benjamin and he made it work. (I think)

When Benjamin poured water in the gutters to test the downspout/rain-barrel connection we found that they (the gutters) leak a bit a the seams. sigh. I don't know if we will fix it or live with it. I also need to work on diverting water away from the foundation instead of gushing down the spout directly at it. another day. Enough domestic duty for one day. Time to play.

We spent about an hour at the Sacramento Chalk It Up Festival at Fremont Park watching some of the artists at work. Maybe we will go back Monday to see finished art. Or at least I will go by on the way to the BloodSource Tuesday afternoon. It is right by there.

Finally around 2 we headed out of town for Jack London State Historic Park - one of the 70 California State Parks slated for closure. Another treasure! Wonderful hiking trails through beautiful woodlands, history, love story, adventure. We arrived fairly late, in fact the House of Happy Walls Museum should have been closing, but we spend some lovely time there enjoying the beauty, the dreams, the adventures of the Londons. We hiked to the ruins of the Wolf House - Jack and Charmian's dream house which was destroyed by fire just as it was finished and just before they moved in. Some of the trails while not paved are wide enough and just about smooth enough for wheelchairs, but they do have steep ups and downs, so wheelchair patrons would need strong helpers. Dogs and bicycles are allowed on some of the trails. We barely got a taste of this lovely park, but enough to know that it is a treasure.

Have I discovered one that is not? It breaks my heart that these parks will be closed. Which really means open to natural deterioration, but worse, vandalism, crime, and other problems like fire and accidents. Oh, California, it is a false economy! The potential liabilities, the loss of public education, recreation and pleasure. These park closures are going to cost us greatly in tangibles and intangibles. I know our budget is in need of dire action, but these park closures have so much negative potential. Besides simply being heartbreaking.

We thoroughly enjoyed our brief visit to Jack London SHP, increased our appreciation for the man and for his wife Charmian. Park signs and Benjamin tried to teach me to recognize poison oak, but I seem to be hopeless. I looked and looked at clearly identified plants knowing that I am very unlikely to recognize it next we meet. Best I just stay on the trail and not touch anything.

On the way home we stopped at the 99 Cents store for our contributions to the Feed The Homeless lunches our Stake puts together periodically.

Finally home. Home-made macaroni and cheese (I actually cooked. Benjamin does not do ALL the cooking) Family Prayer and Scriptures. And another Reading Club chapter of a yet to be released novel by an (as yet) unknown author whom I think has a lot of promise. We feel quite privileged that he is allowing us the honor of reading it before he releases it. You will want to read "All Things Being Equal."

happy day. Happy night and good Sabbath to you.

2011-08-19T12:46:00.000-07:00

I told you a little over a year ago that I considered applying for a job in Fort Bragg. Actually in Russian Gulch State Park. There was a Accounting MST position open in Mendocino Coast District. It included a double wide trailer pad IN MacKerricher State Park - a place we have loved to camp over the years ! It would have meant a demotion and leaving family. But they could visit! What stopped me was finances and my guys. There was no way I could sell my house for what I owe on it (maybe now I could) and I would have to buy
a trailer. Instead of biking to work, I would have to drive. Church would be further away. And the cost of living is more there,too. I like living with my 3 young men. What would they do? Could they get jobs and education there? I decided it wasn't practical. Since then and largely because I stayed I was able to help a couple of my kids going through rough spots. It was the right thing to do.

Then my wonderful supervisor Liz left which was devastating, we had a few leaderless months (which were not at all that bad), and then we got a new supe. Life has not been the same. Ok, I knew it wouldn't be the same, but the work environment is just not what it should be.

I just found out that the gal who got the job didn't work out and got "soft served" back to corrections in Susanville. Rather than poison their happy workplace again, the staff asked that the position not be filled and they would just all do more work. Meaning the position is open. I like to think I could get them to consider me.

Oh, it would be such solace to the soul to live in a State Park and work in a State Park. To be near the ocean and forest.

And work in an office where pleasant work environment is a priority.

But the finances don't still work.

I could live with my family coming to the coast to visit me. Or me coming here on visits.

But what about my guys? I like living with Joseph, Andrew and Benjamin and they are not ready to fledge. Joseph has a job here but needs to improve Andrew needs education and a job. Benjamin will be going on a mission soon (he turns 19 in December) and will need school and a job when he comes back. The question of opportunities is still holding me back.

I also hate the idea of giving up my house. both emotionally and because a trailer pad in the park is not permanent.

so, I am torn. Is it an opportunity and a "sign" or a temptation?

I am pretty sure I stay. I have a pretty good life here. but....

I am actually in tears. Silly, eh?

The Mendocino Coast admin is going for a 4 mile walk to the lighthouse at Point Cabrillo today at lunch. (She promised to think of me.) Do you see what I mean?!

A wise co-worker said that I thought it was a chance of a life time last year, but the chance is still there. Maybe it will be there again/still when/if I am ready.

Back to work - in a grey cubicle in the city.

Fresno Fun

2011-07-28T10:53:00.000-07:00

Tom and Ruth asked me to go to Fresno with the family to watch the kids while they went to a Mona Vie/Team convention. I am not sold on Mona Vie or Team, but I am sold on family and those grandkids, so I took a day off work for a long weekend in Fresno.

After getting to our hotel (the Radisson) Friday, we walked to Joe’s Steakhouse. Ruth, good on-line researcher that she is, found a hamburger lunch special at Joe’s. (I liked the name. Joe and Steakhouse are among two of my favorite words, not that I can remember the last time I have gone to a steakhouse!) The restaurant was full of cowboy décor but empty of people. Well, it was late for lunch and early for dinner. The waitress said they weren’t doing that special anymore. Ruth reminded her that it is currently on the website. The waitress said they had a new webmaster. Ruth expressed hope that they would honor their advertising. Ruth was very pleasant but firm. I am not sure, but I think she won. The hamburgers were ok, not the excellent food we expected from the word steakhouse, but not bad. The kids really enjoyed the lunch.

The kids and I hung out in the hotel room while Tom and Ruth crossed the street to the convention. Since we were right across the street, friends who were in a cheaper place further away had their teenage girl baby sitter and the week(s?) old baby come to our room. They were both very quiet and cute. I was glad that Sophie (my laptop) had come along. The Hinds had brought some DVDs but the hotel room didn’t come with a DVD player. Sophie to the rescue! Ruth and Tom came back with Pizza for supper and came back again around 9pm to see the kids before bedtime. Then back to their meetings until around midnight. (Another reason I do not belong in Team!)

I woke up at my usual 5ish Saturday morning and was lying there wondering what I wanted to do about it when surprisingly the Esther and Jared woke up soon after. Although they were using soft voices, Ruth woke up and then Naomi. The folks were not pleased that the kids were up before the sun, but the kids got to see the sunrise as our window faced east.

Tom and Ruth returned to their Team Meetings which they seemed to be enjoying thoroughly. The kids and I headed out to the Pioneer Day Breakfast being held behind the Fresno Temple. We met up with our cousins David & Melissa, their daughter and nephew who had heard Hinds were coming to Fresno and told them about the breakfast. (Melissa’s great grandfather is my ex-husband Glen’s grandfather.) We go there just as they were announcing last call for seconds, but we got scrambled eggs, sausage and cinnamon roll. Not bad. The only thing I know we missed is orange juice, but we got milk. Naomi loved the cinnamon roll. Got it all over herself. Esther played Stick Pull and Tug-of-War. Jared got his face painted. The kids had snowcones. I think they passed on the cotton candy.

It was getting pretty hot as the Pioneer Day wound down and the kids were eager to visit the Splash Park in Playland. First we walked around the Fresno Temple. It is a good bit smaller than the Sacramento Temple, which is a smallish temple. I think it is a wonderful plan to have more small temples close to more people!

Roeding Park is a bit like Sacramento’s William Land Park – Zoo, Storyland, Playland, duck ponds, picnic areas. Roeding has playground which William Land does not. I don’t know if Roeding has a golf course or a outdoor theater, but we didn’t look around all that much. At the Splash Park, I admit I was selective about the rules I read. I seem to have missed the rule about being in swim clothes, but I definitely noted the rule about walking not running on wet cement. Jared and Esther played for over an hour. Naomi and I dabbled a little, just got our feet wet, but mostly sat in the shade and watched. Jared’s cat face disappeared leaving only smudges here and there.

Finally, refreshed, the kids were ready to move on. Esther was too cold then for their promised carousel ride, so we went exploring at Storyland. I told Esther I wasn’t buying the key because the kids wouldn’t hold still long enough to listen to the stories, so the nice lady “loaned” Esther “her” key. (She only turned on one story book, partly because she hadn’t realized what they were. It was fuzzy and hard to understand, so that was that. But she liked wearing a “golden” key around her neck). When Esther tried to return the key as we left, a different nice lady told her to keep it. Story Land is somewhat like Sacramento’s Fairytale Town only it appears older, both in style of the storybook characters and the need for maintenance and repairs. What a fun place for children to explore! Shady trails winding up down and around. Not ADA or stroller accessible everywhere, so as the kids happily scampered up stairs I would keep one eye on them while looking for a stroller friendly route to their destination. The kids were not much interested in the literary aspect of the park, but they loved exploring, running and climbing. From StoryLand we went back for their carousel ride.

Ride over, Esther and Jared felt ready for sandwiches so it was time to go to Subway. Jared had the sandwich of the day – roast beef. Esther and I shared a bacon sandwich –tomato for me, not for her. Naomi had bits of each.

By then it was 4ish. I thought the zoo closed at 5:30, but we had heard that Fresno has an especially nice zoo, so we went. The ticket lady told us the zoo closed at 6pm, however when Ruth and I were exchanging text messages about whether the kids were available for a parental visit a few minutes after 6 we were still having a wild time at the zoo. We did drift out then. The zoo had lots of shaded paths. Nice. The kids had a great time at the dinosaur diggings convinced that they were real. We saw sea lions, elephants, fresh water rays, and a two toed sloth as well as animals that we might find at our own Sacramento Zoo. The Fresno zebras were more white than the Sacramento zebras -different species. The grizzly bear was smaller than I expected. A young bear, or have I blown them up in my imagination? I bet it would look bigger if we met in the forest!

We had a great day. Naomi was an angel all day long. As soon as we approached the hotel room door, she began to fuss. Not as bad as Friday. (She cried for hours Friday evening before and after Ruth’s 9pm visit.) Ruth had brought a cooler full of food. For Friday’s dinner we paraded through the hotel carrying our bowls of macaroni and cheese down to the microwave in the little Java shop off the lobby and then back to our room. Jared was in the tub when Esther who had been eating slowly announced that she felt sick. I grabbed an almost empty waste basket out of the bathroom and she used it. Too much outside in the heat, probably. She just stayed quiet the rest of the evening and was better in the morning. We watched Harry Potter until the folks came and told the kids to go to bed. After Tom and Ruth left again (they didn’t finish until after 2), Naomi cried and cried, but Esther managed to soothe her and she went to sleep.

We were a little late to Sacrament Meeting. I was surprised how far we had to go to get to an LDS chapel. A couple of good talks about honoring our pioneer heritage by a young married couple. Then we hurried back to the convention center for the Team Interdenominational Church Service. Testimonies of the Lord Jesus Christ. Can’t argue with that. We finished packing. Tom loaded up the car. Tom and Ruth went to more meetings. The kids and I, along with a couple of teens and their charges (1 year and nearly new), hung out in the hotel room until 2. The other babies’ parents were done then. It was also check out time, so the kids and I hung out in the lobby for another hour or so. Oh, we went out to a little garden area by the pool for a few minutes – it was too hot to say out there and it was small with nothing to do. Except look for Jared’s tooth which came out as soon as we got to the little garden seat. We didn’t find it.

When it was time to get in the car to head home Jared nearly cried, but it was none too soon for me. Esther, Jared and Naomi were great, but I was ready to be home.

Saturday Plans

2011-07-09T08:20:00.000-07:00

It's Hop A Park Day and Sugar Cookie Day. I am hoping to hop over to a park today. After some Saturday chores and before picking Benjamin up at 6.

Benjamin is at Stake Youth Conference having a missionary weekend experience.

The State of California is in a big budget mess. The budget for State Parks has been cut back so much that we are going to have to close 1/3 of the parks in our system. 70 parks will be closed by the end of next year. 70 Parks!! The good news is Mac Kerricher State Park one of my personal favorites where we have often
family camped in Fort Bragg is not on the closure list. Near by Russian Gulch State Park is. : ( We are going to try to visit some of them before they are closed. Today I would like to visit South Yuba River State Park. The area includes the longest single-span covered bridge in the world, the steep rugged canyon of the South Yuba River, and the Independence Trail--the first identified wheelchair-accessible
wilderness trail in the country.

We also want to visit Jack London State Historic Park ( Have you read any of his books? Call of the Wild. White Fang. Sea Wolf. I cannot remember what else.) and not far from there Bothe Napa Valley State Park and connected to it by a trail I would like to take, Bale Grist Mill State Park, the site of a water-powered grist mill that was built in 1846. The mill and its 36-foot water wheel are a state historic landmark and have been partially restored. Additionally, the park includes the site of the first church in the Napa Valley as well as the Pioneer Cemetery. We want to do those all in one day, when we have more time than today.

The trouble is we have so many Saturday plans!

Next week is granddaughter Naomi's birthday party - Dr. Suess theme. What shall we do to dress for the occasion?

The week after that Tom and Ruth have convention in Fresno and I am going with them to take care of the kids. There are some fun places for the kids and I to visit there. I hope it is not too hot! Fresno gets hotter than Sacramento, I think. And doesn't get the Delta Breeze. Love the Delta breeze! even though wind makes biking harder for me. IF we decide it is too hot, we might just stay in the motel, watch movies, play games (and jump on the beds?). But I hope we can go out and visit places. There is a place like Fairy Tale Town here in Sacramento that sounds fun. I forget what else. Need to do some research. (Maybe Ruth will. smile)

Then the next weekend is granddaughter Esther's baptism. Sariah's family might do a mad dash down for the event and back?! Happy face!! Maybe a book exchange? Acadia got some books for her birthday that sound good and she and Sariah might like The Help and by then we will be done with Cleo: The Cat Who Mended a Family. Both great reads.

That fills up July.

The first Saturday in August MIGHT be open for our Jack London/Bothe-Napa Valley/Bale Grist Mill excursion.

The next weekend I am thinking about going to the Nevada County Fair in Grass Valley. Huell Howser featured it in one of his programs I watched while doing some chores recently and it looked great. The
fairgrounds are beautiful - in the Sierra Nevadas with lots of tall beautiful trees. Treat Street at the fair is a whole bunch charities selling yummy food.

Then school starts. I am planning on taking a Cost Accounting class so I can qualify for promotional opportunities and will need study time. boo. Benjamin and Andrew will be taking college classes, too,
but as they don't have jobs (yet) they have more study time. I hope Joseph also takes a class. He will need to study on Saturday, as well.

Have a great Saturday!

2011-07-04T21:39:00.000-07:00

Probably my favorite New Year's memory was sometime in my late middle childhood. I went to bed in my attic room. Propped my pillow against the chimney and read until I was sleepy. When I heard the pot banging, horn blowing and carryings on outside, I briefly woke up, murmured Happy New Year, and went back to sleep.

Tonight I am sitting in my room with my computer and a book at the ready listening to classical and patriotic music inside and fireworks outside. This time I have a cooler bag with snacks, as well. And my dog, who wishes she were someplace else.

We attended our Stake's traditional Fourth of July Breakfast. (Stake: geographic based organizational unit of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints comprised of several wards (congregations)) Flag ceremony which included our national anthem well sung and a touching, inspiring account of a couple of Marines in the assault on Guadalcanal in WWII. The events were related by a war correspondent (not at that time a member of the Church) who witnessed them. Waves of our brave boys approached the heavily defended island and many were shot in the water before they reached land. The war correspondent came in a boat behind them. They found two badly wounded Marines and hauled them out of the water. One of them appeared too badly wounded to have any hope, so they turned their first aid attention to the less wounded young man. He, however, insisted that they take care of his buddy first. They looked him over and determined that it was useless to try to save him and told the 2nd Marine so. This wounded young man went to his knees, arranged himself so he could put his buddy's head on his lap, placed his one good hand on the dying man's head and commanded him in the name of Christ and by the power of the Priesthood to live until they could get him the help he needed. The soldier not only survived untl they got him to the hospital ship, but he lived and made a miracle recovery. I am going to try to find the reference for this story.

Anyway, enjoyed the breakfast of pancakes, hashbrowns, sausage, and OJ with the TRuth Hinds, Miriam, & Debi and patriotic music played by a live band. It was good.

After the boys helped load up tables and chairs to be taken back to the meetinghouses from which they were borrowed, we went home, got our things together, including dog, and headed for the coast.

Alas! As we turned toward our usual beach in the Marin Headlands, we saw that the road leading to it was closed!! Fortunately I was able to turn the other way before being trapped into crossing the Golden Gate into San Francisco and paying a toll. Time to find another beach. We passed the turn-off to Muir Beach because we could see from the highway that the beach was crowded. As we wandered further along the coast highway two problems developed. One of us became motion sick and another developed a need for indoor plumbing if at all possible. Not knowing how far we had to go before the next beach opportunity, we took a breather for the motion sickeness and headed back. Tried Muir Beach - the parking and the creative parking were all full. Back towards Marin/Sausalito. Upon sighting a Burger King, another pressure was relieved. Then we found a park-like place and ate fried chicken, potato salad, watermelon, and chocolates. Feeling much better we decided to try to find the alternative way to Rodeo Beach. The tunnel road. Open! and so much less winding then the way we usually go that it may become our regular route.

We took a rather short walk along the coastal trail, went back to the roadside above the beach and watched the people, the waves, and the surfers and headed home. It was good.

The boys' dad, my ex, had called earlier this weekend about getting together to set off the fireworks he had purchased. And maybe play Astronomy Monopoly. He thought our house is safer for fireworks and I thought now I will worry less about them getting home at a semi-decent hour, so they decided he would come here. He had suggested 630, but the guys told him we were going to the beach and might not be back. They called him when we left for home and again when we arrived. I filled a cooler bag with goodies and made my retreat. I assume he came over. Between the music and the fireworks, I cannot hear what else is happening. However he would have arrived a little late to start Monopoly, so I hope they just do the fireworks and call it good.

It has been a good day. Even better than my day is my gratitude for this country. I truly believe that its founders were inspired. America has flaws and problems, but America is great and good. Not as good as she should and could be, but very good. I love this land. I am grateful to her founders and to her defenders. America is a land blessed above other lands. Sadly, we are in danger of losing our blessings as we forsake the God who gave them. I pray that we as a people will again turn to God and live his commandments. God bless America.

I Hate to Exercise

2011-06-29T15:52:00.000-07:00

I hate to exercise.

I do not like calisthenics.

I do not like/have exercise clothes. And no one deserves the pain of seeing me in them.

I do not have the time or want to spend the time changing, exercising, changing again.

I don’t like looking and feeling clumsy, awkward, stupid, inept, etc as I do when attempting to exercise.

I don’t want people laughing at me. If they do, I think I would rather not know about it.

I tried a gym & did not like it on many levels.

I need to stick to low impact because I sometimes have trouble with my joints.

But, of course, I need to exercise.

I do enjoy riding my bike to work. But that is not enough.

Any helpful suggestions?

Any exercises I can do at my desk a minute or two at time without attracting attention from my co-workers while waiting for the computer to do something?

Or something fun, easy, quick and not too sweaty or embarrassing?

The Movie Was Too Short, But Cold Water Is Good For Getting Out Blood

2011-06-28T22:06:00.000-07:00

It's not that we weren't warned. The weather man predicted rain. But come now, rain in Sacramento in late June?? nah. I didn't really pay attention. I thought maybe in the foothills. Or, perhaps some brief light showers in the afternoon. I did not pack my rain gear.

Solid, drenching rain all afternoon and on into the night. Including when I biked from work to the BloodSource and three hours later biked home. As they prepared to set me up to donate platelets, one of the (I think they are mostly all nurses?) asked me if I was drenched. I confessed that I was a little. She offered me a dry shirt. I declined at first, but she pretty much insisted that I put on a dry shirt lest I become too chilled during the procedure. To donate platelets, blood is taken out, put through a machine which removes the platelets, and cycled back to you. The blood is cooled during the process and many people get chilled a bit and need a blanket. I have not noticed the cooling factor. But I did put on the Tshirt.

The donation went well. I had taken Cary Grant's "I was a Male War Bride" which ended a few minutes before the procedure did. So when they bandaged my arm, I pretty much immediately got up, grabbed my bicycle bag and camel back that I always wear on my bike ride, and headed for the ladies room where I dropped my bags in the corner and proceeded to my business. And noticed drops of blood on the floor. I thought some poor woman had been caught off guard and not realized she had left a mess. Until I glanced at my donation arm which was covered with blood from the donation site down. The bandage was saturated. I wiped away the blood and more flowed out. I tried to straighten my clothes, abandoned my bags, and sought help leaving behind a blood splattered bathroom and possibly a trail.

What happened apparently is that while usually my movie runs a bit longer than the donation and I sit there finishing the movie for a few minutes before getting up, this time I got up quickly and picked up my heavier than medically recommended bags which blew my still clogging clot. I felt pretty much ok. I stayed in the chair for a bit after they rebandaged me just to be sure and to reassure them.

I was not happy that one of the workers went to get my bags out of the ladies for me because, as I feared, she thought they were too heavy for me to handle after donating. But she just helped me on with my camel pack and I picked up my bike bag with the other hand.

One of the gals tried to clean up my bloody skirt with peroxide while I sat sipping some hot cocoa. (They treat you so nice at the BloodSource) She couldn't get it all out. But I had a plan: Bike home in the rain. Lots of cool water. Except I donate on the leeward side. I was pretty drenched all over except not so much on the left side. That's ok, I put my clothes to soak when I got home and it looks like they will be ok.

It was raining pretty good, but I enjoyed the ride home surprisingly well. It was definitely cool, but I was not cold. I found the situation slightly amusing. And I was going home where I could get dry clothes and cocoa. : )

My Benjamin is in Lasson Volcanic National Park with the older young men tonight and the rest of the week. Rain / snow / thunder showers today, tonight, and tomorrow. Temperatures in the 30s overnight. They should get sunshine Thursday and Friday. They are probably having character building experiences. I am trying not to worry much. He is, after all, an Eagle Scout. He likes it cool. And he relishes experiences that make a mother cringe. He will probably come home full of hair-raising stories and tickled to death with himself. I won't really rest easy until he does.

But I will go to bed and hopefully to sleep. Good night.

Thankful for roof and bed! and cocoa and for being able to donate and for a bunch of other things!

Good Mormon? Bad Mormon?

2011-06-22T15:54:00.000-07:00

Am I a good Mormon? (Member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints)

I often feel that I am not. Of course, I am not nearly as good as I should be. In so many ways and things I fall short.

I am very far from perfect, yet at the end of the day, I can’t really think of many things for which I need to repent. Or do I CHOOSE not to? Do I refuse to face them? I admit to being a bit reluctant to ASK.

One sister testified that we should be careful what to ask for. She asked to be shown her failings and was nearly overwhelmed! Let me tell you, from my vantage point, I would not have thought so about her.

When I do get up the courage to half-heartedly inquire, I generally ask to just be shown one or two things I should work on now and not the whole list. Most of the time, I do a brief remembrance of the day and not having gotten drunk, murdered anyone or robbed any banks, feel like I don’t have too much for which to repent. Obviously NOT a good Mormon attitude.

Despite not having much need to repent, -) (an sign an old friend and I used to use for tongue in cheek), (A quick on line check says I should use : P or : ?, or : J)

Anyway, despite little need for repentance (pick your symbol), I often think I am not a very good Mormon.

My home and yard are not beautiful. (although we have made great improvements. By “we” I would have to primarily mean Benjamin, but many of us have worked on it.)

Nor am I. Not particularly well groomed and well dressed in attractive, inexpensive self-made clothing or stunning outfits put together from thrift store finds (preferably Desert Industries) draping a trim and healthy body (gag) . I am basically simply not naked (for which the world is profoundly grateful!)

I am not constantly cheerful.

I do not often serve gladly. I neither serve often enough nor gladly enough.

My children, although wonderful, are not all dedicated, active members, and do not all get along. In fact, although wonderful, they are not quite perfect, either.

I do not have a flourishing garden from which I preserve our year’s (or more) supply and bestow bounty on my neighbors. The only things which really seem to flourish are weeds.

Oh, the list is endless!

So, am I a BAD Mormon? No, I don’t think so. I hope not. At least not a very bad Mormon.

I do pass the temple recommend interview - http://lds.org/liahona/2010/08/being-worthy-to-enter-the-temple?lang=eng&query=recommend+questions .

I 'do' and 'don't do' many of the things that people think of when they think of Mormons. But....

I think of Lynn G. Robbins address What Manner of Men and Women Ought Ye To Be?

What does it mean to be a good Mormon? What does it mean to be a good Christian?

Believe in our Savior, Jesus Christ, and daily try to follow him. Really try. Then recognize failures, repent, and try to do better.

I try to follow Christ, but do I REALLY try? Do I do my best? Doubtless not. Best?! Seems like there is a simple fix to that, but in practice, it does not seem quite so simple or at least not quite so easy.

I do think that most of the time, I am facing the right direction and fighting the current that would sweep me along the wrong direction. Most of the time. Hopefully, that counts for something.

Yosemite Trip - 3

2011-06-05T06:54:00.000-07:00

Friday, our last day at Yosemite National Park!

Good news, everyone was well and able to spend the day in Yosemite.

We were so glad to have had this much time in the Park, but four days is not enough! I do wonder how much time would be enough in such a place! There is so much beauty and wonder to see and experience. Miles and miles of trails - even of easy trails for babies and grandmas, to say nothing of the difficult trails for serious hikers and climbers. Towering granite monuments to tiny delicate flowers -everywhere you look there are lovely marvels. And this is certainly not a look and run on kind of place. There is so much to see, hear, feel, savor. I felt that in four days, we had barely made a beginning.

Mirror Lake. The shuttle driver said it was a moderate hike. The trail is paved up to the lake. Part of it is a bit steep, but people can even bike up there - with their own bikes. Rental bikes have a stopping point part way up just before it gets really steep. And I could not bike up that hill. But supposedly some people do. People with amazing leg muscles.

Of course, Mirror Lake was beautiful. The reflected images were lovely. Several of us were even more fascinated by a rock amphitheater full of little inukshuk-like rock sculptures. A few of us added to the collection.

After lunch at picnic tables near the parking lot, we went to Vernal Falls. This is the same trail that goes on to Nevada Falls, the Mist Trail and, for the hardiest, on to Half Dome. It is slightly less than a mile to the bridge below Vernal Falls. A steep-ish fairly rugged mile despite it being all paved. If there ever had been any doubt, this little trek clearly established that I am not Half Dome material. I barely made it to the bridge.

When we were planning this trip, we thought that some of our hardier members would climb Half Dome. Perhaps fortunately for the park and environment, but unfortunately for us, permits are now required to climb Half Dome. A couple of us were on line as soon as permit registration opened, but we were not quick enough. All the permits were taken for the entire week of our trip before we could get to it. As it turned out, it didn't matter anyway. There is still snow on the dome, the cables are not yet up, so nobody climbed Half Dome permit or not.

After being in Yosemite and seeing Half Dome from various vantage points, and having struggled to hike less than 1/8 of the trail, I am vastly more impressed with Benjamin and others who have made the climb. It is most certainly an accomplishment of note! Also, having seen it and having heard more about parts of the trail, I am retroactively frightened. Especially as a couple of weeks ago a hiker slipped to his death on part of the upper Vernal Falls portion of the trail. Too bad for me. Andrew hopes to return and climb Half Dome some day.

Most of the guys along with Sariah and her girls continued up the trail a ways. Sariah and Acadia turned back, but Ryan, Tom, Andrew, Benjamin AND Aurora (!) hiked to the top of Vernal Falls. Those of us who stopped at the bridge didn't know they were going so far. Eventually we went back down the trail intending to reconfigure the car/passenger line-ups and leave them to follow whenever.

Joseph and I left the others briefly to go visit the fen (marsh). Pretty and lots of birds, but evening was falling and the mosquitos were becoming active. On our way to the fen as we passed by some garbage cans along the road, we met a slightly distressed young woman trying to look inside the bear-proof containers. She had lost a little stuffed bear she had had since a child (and who frequently posed in her pictures) and thought someone might have picked it up and thrown it away. (I thought about my sorrow at losing my purple cow.) Joseph figured out how to open the bear-proof cans but there was no bear. (Of course! - the garbage cans were "bear proof") We parted company a little sadly, but she went check to see if it had been turned in at the Visitor's Center. Just as we were about to get on the shuttle heading back into Yosemite Village, she popped up smiling and showed me that she had her bear! I was happy for her and glad that we bumped into each other again and could share her joy.

Incredibly, somehow we all managed to reunite at the shuttle stop and catch the same bus back.

We stopped at Yosemite Store, then walked back to our cars savoring our last few minutes in Yosemite. It is a hard place to leave.

Yosemite - 2

2011-06-04T17:21:00.000-07:00

This incredible week just flew by. The condos are so comfortable and convenient. I slept a murphy bed - partly for the novelty, partly because it has a great firm mattress, and partly so I could hear my guys coming 'home' from hanging out with their siblings after my bedtime. Which wasn't much of an issue for long, because we all came back from Yosemite happy but tired!

Tuesday Jared was sick so he and Tom stayed 'home' while we visited Mariposa Grove and Bridalveil Falls. We took the easy hike to the California Tunnel Tree. We took the stroller on that hike, but the trail was not completely stroller friendly. Benjamin carried Naomi in the stroller over one rough stretch. You do a lot of looking up in Yosemite! At Bridalveil Falls it was like standing in a rain storm. Mist is hardly the word for the water in the air. Beautiful and awe-some. When we returned Jared was all smiles and playing. : )

It's was Debi's turn to be sick Wednesday and Thursday which was overdoing it just a bit. This is supposed be vacation, not sick leave. She slept in and tried to come down later on Wednesday, but still felt so sick, she just slept in the car in the parking lot. Not fair! Thursday she stayed at Worldmark and fortunately Friday she was able to enjoy Yosemite again.

Wednesday morning we did a service project working as volunteers with Ranger Tom, Ranger Molly, Ranger Lindsey, and Fire Service Kelly. Oh my horror when I learned our job was to KILL BABY TREES! Apparently the conifers grow faster and require less sunlight than the Black Oak and will take over the meadow if not stopped. Fire - either natural or set by the natives - used to thin out the undergrowth and kill the baby conifers giving the Black Oak (which produces superior acorns for eating) a better chance. (Also, if the conifers take over, it will spoil a lot of tourist views) It wouldn't do to let fire have free rein in Yosemite Valley, so we were the fire.

We visited shops in the afternoon which was nice, but not nearly as nice as working with the rangers.

At some point Wednesday, Benjamin realized that his flashlight was missing and probably had fallen out during our work in the meadow. He determined to look for it the next day.

Thursday morning got off to a slow and shaky start. Debi was still sick and kid critical clothing needed to finish laundering. We made our way by separate groups to the park, did our own thing for a bit, then met up at Yosemite Falls. The boys and I did a like bike riding in the valley. Awesome! (Isn't everything in Yosemite?) First, Benjamin biked back to Cooks Meadow, scene of the tree removal. We had worked a fairly large area. What were the chances of finding his flashlight?? But Benjamin knows Someone who sees and knows everything. A quiet little chat, a bit of inspiration, and Benjamin not only found his flashlight, but a lopping tool that had been overlooked.

We did the easy little hike to Lower Yosemite Falls. Spectacular. Then we drove out to Glacier Point. Talk about a view!

That is Some Artist!

Yosemite Trip - 1

2011-06-04T15:58:00.000-07:00

For me a vacation usually means tent camping or sleeping on a relative's floor or couch (That's not totally true - Sariah always has a nice airbed for me.) This week we were spoiled! Tom's folks have membership (ownership? whatever) with WorldMark and arranged for us to stay at Bass Lake. 3 two bedroom units, with murphy bed in the living room. Most of my children gathered for a week at Yosemite!

We really packed my little Cavalier. Four adults, clothes and toiletries. Four bikes and helmets. Four camel packs. Food for the four meals we were doing for the group plus our breakfasts and some snacks during the week. A couple of laptop computers. We stuffed that little car. But were confident we would have a little more room coming home. After all, we were going to eat the food. ha ha. Somehow it was more crowded coming home and we barely got it all in. But it was certainly worth it!

The Worldmark units were lovely, comfortable and came with fully stocked kitchens. (Not the food, but pots, dishes, blender, etc) Nothing like camping! 2 and 1/2 bathrooms. Plenty of towels. A small washer and dryer in the unit. Gas fireplace. Heated swimming pool, spa/sauna (whatever), playground, basketball hoops, tennis courts - and equipment at the office. Each unit got a coupon for a free movie rental. The units were lovely. But we were not there much!

I slept in the murphy bed - partly for the novelty, partly because it has a great firm mattress, and partly so I could hear my guys coming 'home' from hanging out with their siblings after my bedtime. Which wasn't much of an issue, because we all came back from Yosemite each evening happy but tired and they didn't stay out real late.

Saturday was travel and check in day. A bit rainy. More rain on Sunday. That was ok with us. Get the rain taken care of before we hit the Park. We settled in and relaxed. Sariah and I went to the grocery store where I bought more than we needed and later had to figure out how to get home.

Sunday after church we just hung around the condos. Tom & Ruth's place was the gathering spot. That worked best for the baby.

Sunday afternoon, the kids played hide and go seek. A good trick, I thought, as they were restricted to the lower level and there were not too many hiding places. I thought! The kitchen cupboards were popular. Behind a plant. In the coat closet. At one point Aurora hid in the coat closet, but was none too quiet about getting in so Jared, who was counting just feet away, naturally heard her. When Jared opened the closet door, he saw Acadia standing there, not Aurora! He wasn't playing with Acadia at the time, so he closed the door again. With much encouragement, he looked there twice more before finding Aurora who had been behind Acadia! (by this time, Acadia had left the closet).

Tom decided to hide. He lifted up the couch cushion and curled up under it. Ruth sat on it. As you can imagine, his body was quite visible below the cushion and Ruth was sitting nearly two feet higher
than normal. Jared and Esther looked for something like ten minutes - with the adults laughing nearly hysterically and a couple of people taking pictures. They looked under the coffee table in front of the
couch without seeing him. It was a bit amazing.

Three things bothered me about this trip.

1. Leaving my animals, especially Anna. But Janet from GoFetchPetSitting relieved my mind there for the most part. We had pretty much daily email/text messages, which helped me feel comfortable. We returned to a warm welcome from pets in good shape.

2. That David and Teresa did not come. It's complicated.

3. And that we missed the Mt Vernon Memorial Day service Monday which we have attended regularly for years and which is always deeply moving. Tom found a video for us to watch about the writing of the Star-Spangled Banner. Then we went geo-caching. Debi organized it on her smart phone and we did 2 easy ones. Our first cache was at the local cemetery. A charming old cemetery beautifully decked out with large flags lining the roadway and small flags on veterans' graves. Very appropriate.

Before geo-caching, Joseph and I went into town to get him swim trunks, but the only swimming actually happened while we were there. : ) I think Tom took a dip one evening when we came in from hiking, but that was it that I know of. It was nice to have it available, but who had time?!

We had decided to wait to go into Yosemite until after Memorial Day because of the crowds. A good call, but later we felt that 4 days in Yosemite was great, but not enough. We have a video about Yosemite in which a ranger says that if he had only one day to spend in Yosemite, he would sit down and cry. I understand now!! We couldn't really have done much better, though. Being in accounting, Miriam and I had a hard time getting time off during June because of fiscal year end. Since it was only a few days at the very beginning of June, we got it, but more any later and we would have been denied. At least, I would. It took my boss months to relent and ok my time off.

Yosemite is incredible. Words and pictures do not begin to do it justice. More than the incredible sights, there is a special feeling there. I think we all fell in love this week.

More later, but like I said, it won't do justice to Yosemite.

Trailer Tale

2011-06-02T08:48:00.000-07:00

My little old utility trailer purchase reminds me of the story "If You Give a Mouse a Cookie".

If you buy a trailer from Craigslist, you need to get it transferred. When you go to DMV you will find that you did not purchase from the last registered owner. Call the seller for information on who sold it to him, but he doesn't have anything. Go back to the seller and have him sign a statement of fact. Back at DMV sign a statement of fact of your own. Good. Now, it's your trailer.

But the lights don't work properly. You signal left and the trailer signals right. If the lights are wired backwards, your son might try to fix them. If your son tries to switch the wiring, the lights stop working at all.

If your trailer lights don't work, you might go to an auto shop to have them fixed. The shop will tell you that the whole thing is a patch up job that really should be replaced, but they can fix it up for now. If the shop does some good patch work on your trailer light wiring, they might offer to check the air in the tires.

If the wiring guys check the air in your tires, they might tell you that 1) the wheels don't match, 2) one is actually are car spare, 3) the other is rotten. You need to replace the wheels and tires. But they don't do that.

If you need your trailer tires replaced, you will make several phone calls to find a shop that carries and hopefully installs trailer wheels.

If you find a shop that carries trailer wheels, they will tell you that they only have one but you can pay for two and go to their warehouse to pick up the other one. They will ask the shop guys if they have time to put them on. When you get out to that shop, they will tell you that the shop guys are too busy, but anyone can change a wheel actually. Or they can recommend the place down the road. Before sending you to go get the 2nd wheel, the tire guys nicely will come out to check your tire size.

If the tire guy looks at your trailer, he will gasp in horror and exclaim that you can NOT drive that trailer any where. The spring hooks or spring hangers or something like that are broken and the whole trailer could drop down onto the wheels if you go over a bump. I was lucky to get to them.

If the trailer wheel guys spots the broken spring hangers, he will send you down the road to another trailer guy who will also gasp in horror.

Instead of loading the trailer up with bikes to ride out in park trails, you will leave the trailer to get an estimate next week. "Don't worry, it's not a big problem."

I don't know if I saved any money or wasted money buying from Craigslist. The cost is adding up. Would it have been better to buy new? I THINK it is still cheaper, but I am not sure.

As Jospeh said Judge Judy said, Sometimes cheap can be pretty expensive.

Someday I will have a trailer. And hopefully my transmission can handle it.

Turkeys and Eagles, Socks and Knots

2011-05-16T16:24:00.000-07:00

Effie Yeaw Nature Center, being a nature center, is subject to nature. Therefore we arrived at the amphitheater a couple of hours early to clean the benches and the deck as well as do a little bit of setting up - refreshment table and picture table. Some of the local residents came by to check up on us. What a bunch of turkeys! A good of the required clean up was because they, too, enjoy gathering at the amphitheater.

Sorry, I cannot seem to do pictures on my blog right now. Check out my Facebook album "Benjamin Robarts Eagle Scout Court of Honor"

The Court of Honor was a pleasant blend of (well deserved) praise for Benjamin, tribute to Scouting, and fun - fond fun memories of Benjamin and of Scouting. If by any chance the audience became bored with the proceedings (which I doubt), they were entertained by passing turkeys and deer.

Our Emcee was Logan Hancock, Eagle Scout and former Senior Patrol Leader

The 11 Year Old Scouts did opening and closing flag. Through some slight mishap, the flag pole stands were in a car headed in another direction, but they wouldn't have held up during the breeze anyway. A pair of Eagles went behind the deck during flag and secured the poles to the deck railing with bungees. It was handled so smoothly and respectfully, one would think it the original plan. The young Scouts presented the flag in a very respectful and dignified manner.

Ethan Foell, current Senior Patrol Leader, lead the Scout Oath and Law.

I noticed when the Eagles in the audience were recognized that they were all young men. None of the leaders present who had been so instrumental in helping these boys grow were themselves Eagle Scouts. I thought how wonderful it is of them to give so much time and dedication to help boys achieve what they had not had the privilege to. To a man, I would say that each of them have Eagle spirit and character. Even more than Eagles, they are true disciples of Christ who willing serve His sheep.

As at least one of the speakers, Don Farrimond whose assignment was "100 Scouts" reminded us, Scouting touches boys for the better and influences their lives for good even if they do not make the rank of Eagle.

Riley, another Eagle and former Senior Patrol leader shared some Scouting memories, but he was not the only one. Whatever the assignment was except for flag, prayer, and oath and law, each program participant added their personal admiration for Benjamin. It was touching and heart swelling to hear so many men and young men extolling Benjamin. His cheerfulness, dependability and can-do spirit were spoken of again and again. As well as some of his adventures. His first week-long camp when he wore the same pair of socks ALL week was fondly(?) remembered. As well as the Battle of the Racoons one night in his tent at Point Reyes. And his skill at knots. (Pioneering was his first and favorite merit badge.)

Andrew, brother, Eagle Scout and newly returned missionary, issued the Eagle challenge, reminding Benjamin to BE an Eagle all his life. Also, referring to his knot tying skills, he said something like, "No more knots to tie. Well, maybe ONE." which got a good laugh.

Benjamin chose to honor Greg Foell with the mentor pin for his life long example and particularly for the role he played in Benjamin's life as Teacher Quorum Adviser. (14-15 year old boys) One lesson Benjamin particularly appreciated learning from him was to look people in the eye.

In a highlight of the program Ray Hamaker led the old Troop 40 song which has great memories and meaning for many of the boys. Then he led us in the adaption making it the Troop 941 song:
"We put the out in Scouting and we'll continue shouting, 'We are the spirit of 941!'
Roll out the Scouting thunder! (clap) We'll win, we won't go under.
We are the spirit of 941!
We welcome all the boys and all their hopes and joys.
We put the light of the Scouting torch on high.
Roll out the Scouting thunder! (clap) We'll win, we won't go under.
We are the spirit of 941!"

We hope that 941 adopts it and some of the spirit we felt in Troop 40. Hopefully, Benjamin's 11 year olds, at least, will pick it up.

I also hope that Benjamin's example will help strengthen other young men on their trail to Eagle.

I am so grateful for the Scouting program. I think Boy Scouts of America is great!

What did you dream last night?

2011-05-13T17:54:00.000-07:00

I seldom dream or, if I dream, I don't remember it.

Last night I dreamed twice.

I dreamed that a friend spent all evening giving me a pedicure.
I have never had a pedicure, although I have thought it might be nice. Where did this come from? Well, one toe is a little sore from me clipping a nail too close. My daughter--in-law recently had her first pedicure and was showing off her pretty toes. The friend is involved in Benjamin's Eagle Court of Honor tomorrow which is occupying my mind quite a bit. Why I picked him I have no idea. I really doubt that he gives pedicures. It would be nice if he gave his lovely wife a pedicure - or at least massaged her feet now and then. Dreams are
strange.

I woke up in the night and had trouble going back to sleep. When I finally did, it was a bit of a nightmare and I believed it at first of course. It was raining. My roof has been torn off and water was dripping from the ceiling which wasn't looking too good on to my bed. It took quite a while for me to realize that I was not in my own bed or even in my own room. I was in a room I hadn't slept in for years and it was the old color before we painted it. oh, good! this isn't real!

What is real is that our house is being re-roofed and this has been tear-off week. It has been really good roofing weather, but rain is predicted this weekend. Not Saturday, thankfully! but possibly Saturday night and Sunday. I have been concerned about the house. My contractor, Lucio owner and sole employee of D Design Build, assures me that it will be ok unless we get major deluge. He expects to have the board covering the "ribs" of the roof in place and the roofing paper over it.

Do you remember your dreams?

Welcome Home

2011-05-03T16:49:00.000-07:00

Why was I so nervous Friday as we drove to the airport to pick up ~~Andrew~~ Elder Robarts? We were in plenty of time to find a parking place and the right terminal and all that. Picnic food was ready and waiting at home to be traded for the suitcases we would soon have in the trunk. There was no doubt that we would recognize each other. I don’t know. But I was nervous.

Andrew’s dad was already there waiting. The flight was on schedule. Our former Bishop, the one who sent Andrew out, came to the airport. I began to worry that his sisters wouldn’t make it as planned – especially as the arrival time passed. But it takes a couple of minutes to get everything settled and deplane. The girls and kids arrived minutes before the passengers came down the escalator. Esther and Jared had a “Welcome Home Uncle Andrew” sign that Esther had made. They stood in front holding their sign, then the sisters, then Dad, Bishop, and Joseph and I holding a Welcome Home Elder Robarts sign for him to run through. (Not pretty like Esther’s sign)

I chatted with the family of another Elder coming home (to Merced or is it Modesto? I keep forgetting) from the Canada Winnipeg Mission. We had a nice conversation. The Dad was quite friendly and talkative which seemed to embarrass his daughters. “She doesn’t want to hear about that!” they said. It was all very interesting, but I hardly remember a word. I just know that he is very proud of his kids and has had some good experiences with them.

We knew our missionaries would be among the last because they would politely wait for the other passengers around them.

And there he was! Hugs all around! He looks great. He seems taller. More hugs for Mom!

On the drive home, ~~Andrew~~ Elder Robarts kept exclaiming about how green it is here and how well you can see the paint on the road. Winter can be long and hard in Canada.

At home, there was a good bit of exclaiming about the improvements and changes. (and eating Ranger Cookies Benjamin had ready) Elder Robarts approached the small half bath off the family room saying, “Well, I am sure this room hasn’t changed.” Opened the door, then shut it with a look of amazement. It has been painted and there are fish decals swimming along the walls. Fun.

With difficulty we tore everyone away, loaded up the food in Ruth’s and my cars and headed to the park for his welcome home picnic. We were almost surprised to see that the tablecloths that Benjamin and I had spent over an hour trying to tape down were still there. It was a windy day!

All of Andrew’s Sacramento siblings were there except Tom who was out of town for work. Friends from the ward came by. We ate lots of good food and visited. Elder Robarts played Frisbee with his brothers and went over to the playground between visiting.

We got a welcome phone call that his release appointment was moved from 8:30pm to 7:15. Which meant we needed to quickly clean up the picnic stuff, take it home, put away what left-overs we could cram in the fridge, and get him out to the Cordova building. We thought it was a family thing, so his siblings, nieces and nephew joined us. It was, however, private. Just him and Stake Presidency Counselor Norman. That’s ok. Entertainment was provided. Galena Street East was performing the resident ward.

Newly returned and released missionary Andrew went home, got out his skateboard and went off BY HIMSELF for a few minutes. Alone for the first time in two years. Then one of his sisters whisked him and Benjamin away to play. Joseph and I stayed home, caught the recap of the royal wedding, and went to bed.

Saturday was a busy day. We spent the morning at the Mormon Helping Hands service project cleaning and beautifying a local elementary school. A nice lunch at a park by another school MHH worked on. Visiting with David and Teresa who also worked MHH. A very short time at home. Thankfully our friends who want help moving changed the date to the following weekend! Then off to Debi’s for Chinese Dinner and games. We played Sribblish and Things.

We enjoyed a relaxed Sunday morning before taking Andrew and Benjamin to choir practice. At church, Andrew was constantly greeted and welcomed home – well, not DURING meetings, of course! Testimonies were shared, lessons taught. Then we had David and Teresa over to dinner. David, Teresa, Benjamin and Andrew played Uno with multiple decks including Princess Uno (because it has dragons and not because that was the only way Elder Robarts could hold a girl in his hands while on his mission.)

This week he is settling in and slowly working his way through his various possessions which burst from two very packed suitcases and landed all over the front room.

Welcome home, Andrew!

Happy Hour

2011-04-10T11:21:00.000-07:00

According to May's Reader's Digest “We're happiest at 7:26p p.m. On Saturday nights.”

Are you?

Not me.

I am happiest about 24 hours earlier on Friday evening.

Friday evening I am so tired, I don't want to do anything. (Unfortunately, not a rare thing.) I barely can stay awake until it's time to watch “Who Do You Think You Are?” the only show I watch regularly. But, it's Friday night! The work week is behind me and the weekend awaits!

On Friday evening, the weekend is full of promise and I am under the happy delusion that I will become well rested, get lots of chores & housework done, spend time with my much neglected dog, spend time with family, have some relaxing fun, and maybe more.

Of course, most of that on Saturday. By 7:26 pm on Saturday, I realize that I have not accomplished half of the things I had hoped for.

Sunday is good. Especially – stand back, beware of possible lightening strike! - Sundays without extra meetings. Although some of those are great.

On Sunday, I am not going to get any chores done - no grocery runs or fill-ups. Shopping and such that I didn't get done on Saturday will have to wait until – who knows? I will figure it out later.

Sunday I will pretty much set aside the work-a-day worries and concerns. I might spend time with family – in person, email, or sometimes by phone. Or enjoy quiet time. I might rest. Maybe I will try to learn a little bit about using Family Search. Or maybe, dare I hope? Do some Stamping. I will worship, learn, and visit at church. I will renew covenants and hopefully strengthen my spirit. I was going to say that I will try to remember what life is really all about, but honestly, I TRY to do that every day. It is certainly easier to remember on Sunday when that is basically the focus of most of our activities. I will partake of the Sacrament and remember my Savior's great redeeming love and sacrifice. That really is the best. Next best is being with the other struggling, lovely Saints.

The bad thing about Sunday, especially evening, is that it is Monday eve. The work week looms ahead. The worst thing about work is the time it takes away from my life. And I am usually still tired. Usually not AS tired as I was Friday night, but still tired.

If I were a really good person, I would say that Sunday is my best and happiest day. Sunday IS good. (until evening) Maybe it is my happiest DAY. But, I think my happiest HOUR is Friday evening.

Philippians 3:2

2011-04-05T07:22:00.000-07:00

Soon after I adopted Anna, I began taking her to East Portal Park while Benjamin was in Seminary. In the pre-dawn quiet nearby residents often used the park as an informal puppy park. There Anna made friends and romped with dogs of various breeds and sizes. The most regular visitors to the park and Anna's best friends were Sydney & Davos, Bernese Mountain Dogs, and Tuffy, an Australian Shepherd.

Tuffy's owners took a particular liking to Benjamin, recognizing him to be an exceptionally fine young man. They soon began asking him to Tuffy-sit when they were out of town. At first Benjamin would go to their house a couple of times a day to tend Tuffy who stayed in the backyard. (I don't know how the neighbors felt about that because Tuffy has a very sharp bark and is a lively dog to say the least.) Soon Tuffy began coming to our house to stay while her owners were away. A nice arrangement for all of us. Anna and Tuffy are always delighted to see each other - although after the initial happy greeting, they often ignore each other most of the time. And here I hoped they would play together and give each other company and exercise. Tuffy loves tennis balls and begs for them to be thrown all day and most of the night. She whines and cries and barks for her ball to be thrown. Rarely does one see her get weary.

We are nearing the end of another such visit of little over a week. Last evening everything changed. I don't know what happened as I was in the other room. Even Benjamin, who was right there, is not sure.

Benjamin had been tossing the ball for Tuffy. Generally, Anna doesn't care much about tennis balls and basically ignores them. Yesterday, she did show some interest in them for a while. Maybe that led to the problem? Suddenly the dogs were fighting!! Benjamin grabbed Anna to pull her off . Anna is much bigger so she was naturally most easy to get hold of. As he pulled Anna, both dogs came - one or both was holding the other. He shook them free of each other. Joseph somehow at that point was more or less between the dogs who were still trying to get to each other. (Anna's tail was wagging. Which seems strange. What does that mean? They were not playing. Tuffy has no tail, no read there) Joseph tried to help keep the dogs apart by grabbing Tuffy's collar. She bit him. He grabbed the nearby dog bed and subdued her under it. About then I showed up, got Tuffy's leash on her and Joseph let her go.

Joseph went to wash his bite. Benjamin and I quickly checked the dogs for any signs of obvious damage - none. We now have a family room dog and a front of the house dog with a baby gate between. I don't know what set them off. Anna became unreliable around some strange dogs and I no longer take her to the dog park. Tuffy is a very good dog, of a 'sharper' breed, but never shown any vice. We have long known that Anna the food hound is a little protective of her food and we never feed them together, but other than that, they have been so good together. There goes Benjamin's pleasant little job and Tuffy's folks pleasant dog care.

Joseph's little finger was pierced in a number of places with scrape-ish wounds. Tuffy bit and Joseph probably reflexively pulled away. Fairly bloody. And of course, his hand didn't feel quite right. Choosing to err on the side of caution, we went to Kaiser. They were very good to us, but we were low priority, of course, so we were there for hours. It was determined that there is no major damage although his whole finger is covered with wounds. Just one finger and mostly surface damage. Eventually, armed with oral and topical antibiotics and dog/cat wound instructions, we got home around 1 or so. Not really bad for an emergency room trip, but plenty late for us.

When I opened the New Testament for my bedtime scripture read, I read Philippians 3:2 "Beware of dogs"