sugar crash

Something new and different this evening.

Today is Fast Sunday.  I have a rather poor history of fasting.  I had many years when I was pregnant or nursing and did not fast.  Later I developed diabetes and usually did not fast.  When one would have otherwise fasted, I merely ate more simply and perhaps less.  I avoided eating treats and foods that would smell and bother those who were fasting.  I sometimes felt a little guilty as partly I used actual health concerns as an excuse not to sacrifice and practice spirit over body.  Additionally, one occasionally hears of the health benefits of fasting as a dieting live style.

Today, partly as an exercise of self control and to help with blood sugar levels and weight, I decided to fast more completely.  I admit I was less spiritually involved as a fast should be. It went well.  I skipped breakfast, only took my morning medicines with a glass of milk.  I didn't eat until when around 2 or so I began to feel low blood sugar warnings, tested at 71 and ate lightly.  I thought things had gone quite well.

Dinner was early - around 4:30.  Pot roast, barley, carrots, and broccoli. My blood sugar was 94 and I was happy with that.  I was a little worried that I might over indulge and take it up too high at dinner, but not too worried.  I did my pre-dinner insulin and medication, enjoyed dinner - lots of roast, decent amount of vegetables, moderate amount of barley.  I relaxed watching TV. 

And then I crashed.  I may have dozed as I did not feel early warning symptoms.  I started feeling way more than low sugar warnings, I definitely felt off, dizzy (although sitting), vision slightly off, anxious, weak, unsteady.  I wanted to go to my room to test but was a bit afraid.  I had trouble getting there.  In the movies sometimes you see  where everything is out of focus, tilted, maybe spinning, sound and vision are not right.  I thought that was artistic expression or something, but tonight I found out that it is real.  I barely made it to my room.  Tested at 41.  Scary.  I  took a glucose pill and some chocolate.  Tested at 56.  Still concerned and confused.  I went out of my room, not sure what I wanted, having a little trouble walking and navigating.  Joseph asked if I was ok and I told him that I was not sure.  Perceptive, he asked if it was low blood sugar and I affirmed.  I sat down and he brought me milk.  I knew that I was beginning to recover and told him so, but it was still worrisome.  Even Miriam, coming out , probably to ask for help getting her something to eat, became concerned and wanted to help me.  They were wondering when / whether to call for professional help.  I wanted to climb out of it, but was also afraid of over correcting.  Joseph sat with me back in my room for a bit watching to make sure I did  not pass out.  They did not want me to lay down and go to sleep.  I felt like it, but also wondered if it were safe.  I went back to the family room and Joseph set up for me to watch Heartland, then helped Miriam.

After an episode of Heartland, I felt pretty much normal.  We had family prayer and scripture.  I returned to my room.  Bedtime. I had slightly over corrected and my blood sugar is 196, but that is not so frightening.  High blood sugar is long term dangerous - wearing down the body like grit in motor oil, but low blood sugar can be immediately dangerous.  I feel normal inside now.

While I was crashing, staggering through the house, or sitting in the front room drinking my milk, I looked around my out of focus, but clearly chaotic and messy house - partly because of the kitchen project and partly because my homemaking/organizing skills are seriously lacking, and kept thinking "I cannot leave this mess.  I cannot leave them with this mess."  Obviously something I need to work on.

Take aways. Besides, that I need to seriously up my domestic game.

 I probably won't fast, or more likely, depending on how i feel, possibly fast one meal and eat lightly the next.  But no full or lengthy fast.  Even this one had been short - nothing close to 24 hours or two complete meals, while some people do three.  My "normal" meals should, no doubt, be lighter than they usually are.   I should eat more lightly and maybe more often or regularly all the time.

Bigger take away.  (Andrew was outside doing dishes (no kitchen sink because of the ongoing kitchen project)  so he missed most of this.  Which slightly distressed him when he found out.)  I was touched by the love and support from Joseph and Miriam, especially Joseph.  Miriam, who is usually the one that people help, and Joseph, who I am often sure does not quite like me, were concerned, caring, helpful and supportive. They really wanted me to be ok and definitely did not want something to be or become seriously wrong.   Being good people, I know that they would show the same concern and helpfulness to a stranger in trouble or even someone they really didn't like, but still I felt an element of love in their compassion.  Joseph was very nurturing.  That is a part of his nature which is why animals and children love him so, but to have it directed at me was special.